Is the Internet Taking Over Your Life? Shocking Study Results!

realize that having it in my hand is sending a message whether I think it is or not well just say something to me just stop me well we don't want to disrupt your work so on one hand I'm asking them to be respectful and respect my boundaries so that I can work when I'm on work but on the other hand I'm not respecting their boundaries and making it clear when I'm not working and that's the challenge of digital addiction right in social media interaction it's like and I think that's a Telltale sign that you're addicted to something if you put blame on someone else rather than taking the responsibility yourself so let's talk about our topic today I was scrolling through the internet not addicted and I found a article that talked about internet addiction and I thought this was rather interesting because the article said they did this new study and they broke down the different categories of internet addiction and I got the article I'm gonna pull it up here in a second but just before we go into the article initial thoughts hot takes on internet addiction yeah dude what does ASA we as X addicts are procrastinators enhancements as us focusing on everyone else's problems as a distraction from facing our own stuff yep that's good dude yeah yeah so my thoughts on internet addiction dude that is a real thing it's so funny like my wife and I we've been challenged to try to like sleep with our phones downstairs rather than charging on our nightstand that makes me nervous just you talking about it I get anxious just hearing that but you don't realize it the first thing that you generally do when you wake up is check your phone to see how many notifications you have there's like this itch it's like ah like who text me what did I miss or did somebody follow my page or did somebody like my post like we're we're we're looking for this release of dopamine and I will be the first to admit that I get addicted to my phone and if I don't have my phone near me there's a little bit of a problem because I'm like this is part of who I become in essence based upon the culture and the society that living in nowadays where it's socially acceptable to have a phone at your disposal or in your hand 247 everyone's on social media your work invols phone your your Fitness now your health right check your heart rate all these different things is revolving around technology so for someone to say that they don't need their phone or they don't use their phone is pretty absurd nowadays and there are people that are out there that are off grid and I give them Kudos and I'm all about that but we don't have no cell signal right the country but no we need it and I think there's a big difference between the need and the want right and distinguishing the two because there are people that are very good at managing especially nowadays where you have on your phone it says like how much time you've been on your how much screen time you've had and looking at that like four hours or five hours of screen time it might not seem like a lot but that's a long time that's almost somebody's full hour work shift yeah hours on your phone like what were you doing that long yeah I know I've got mine open so I 90% of my work right I edit videos for people I do social media content for people doing the podcast even my sermon prep 90% of my work I've got a computer open like and so and then in the middle of that workday my phone is open right next to me right and so like it's like man I'm on the internet constantly like I don't know how my work would function without having access like Tech is just integrated in everything we do and so like how do we find that balance of using something healthily what I'm saying having a healthy habits with the internet using it for work but then being able to like shut it down when we don't need it let me pull the article up so this is on New York Post and I've also got the study here on the website but New York Post talked about this so they said that the internet addiction Spectrum detailed and study find out where you rank in the scale and so I guess they broke down this study of internet addiction and gave some categories to those who are using the internet and addiction so you've got casual users 14.86% these are the folks that go online for specific tasks they log off without lingering they show no signs of addiction they're generally older with an average of 33 I am not old go on what the heck anyways they're the last interested in exploring new apps and so casual users so I guess those are I guess those would be my parents right yeah they probably don't even log on or off dude right it's just make a phone call and that's about it and then you got initial users they find themselves on long line longer than they initially planned they're somewhat neglectful of household chores but don't consider themselves addicted they're moderately interested in apps have an average age of 26 neglectful of household chores no you're just a child that's yeah that's I've got my phone with me while I'm cleaning because I would almost want to say that I'm an initial user but I don't neglect household chores like now you're categorizing me as this individual so now like when culture sees me see this is the thing with these things where it has like different SE like what's your rank because think about what that does to somebody's mind when they read this and they're like well hold up am I this now you've identified yourself and this is why it's so important to understand your identity in Christ and this is just my take on this right because now you're going to identify yourself as an addict because of how you use your device rather than seeing yourself in the light in the image of who God has created you to be right and so like is using your device a bad thing is it a good thing right it's like the tree of knowledge of Good and Evil right like there's maybe that's even a bad point so like just take that out of the equation of what I just said there I'm sorry delete but we'll edit that out for YouTube I think it's just it's amazing to me because we're a culture where it's like this is who you are or this is who you are and so like people are not really engaging who they are according to God's word they're engaging who they are according to the studies of America and I think that's dangerous it's good but it's also dangerous at the same time I don't know what your thoughts are on that but like just reading this even right here I don't know if I'm offended or I'm just like you're probably an addict yeah maybe I'm maybe I just don't want to accept that like but we talked about that think it's just funny dude like I don't know we talked about that with Courtney so you remember Courtney she had been really victimized right like she had a terrible upbringing terrible story about things that had happened to her but how she had to move from that victimized mindset right and so we do have in culture it's like and I don't know that it's new to Modern Times where we're labeled by our issue rather than who we are in Jesus right and so woman with the issue of blood right what I'm saying the paralytic and you hear all these identity shifts and that's why I think the Bible there's such a recurring theme of the Lord giving people new names that's it right because it's a reestablishing of identity and so we see stuff like this and don't get me wrong I love studies like this I think can be useful at some point because when I see them I'm like maybe all of this is maybe the first three are like okay well whatever right because there are four stages of addiction just in general we learned about that early on at Teen Challenge there is the experimentation social use social interaction using for social reasons there is daily use or what they call preoccupation and then there is using just to feel normal and I always thought that was helpful to address where people were on the addiction Spectrum right but maybe it's just these two that become an issue these bottom two right I think too though like even to like piggyback on what you just mentioned the reality is as you mentioned there's nothing wrong with these studies because the way that I look at them as Billboards or warning signals like hey look you're stepping into the D zone right and it's become a problem and so using your device isn't necessarily wrong but the manner in which you're using your device and the extent in which you're using your device you're now allowing your device be to become your source of life like your drive your hunger your thirst whatever it may be and I think that's that's what's really scary for a lot of these young individuals and even adults because they feel as if their sense of value and significance or meaning and purpose is wrapped up in technology and I try to keep an eye on this I understand where technology and looking at where where Society is heading with some of the stuff about the metaverse and augmented reality and virtual reality and all of this stuff that is on the horizon right and the world that our kids are going to grow up in and the world our kids are going to be raising their children in and how like how in integrated technology is going to be and I've never been one of those people that like I think every new thing is evil right because I see that all the time people talk about social media and it's just evil it's like no it's just a microcosm of life like it doesn't social media doesn't doesn't do anything but expose who we really are on a higher level right and it's the same thing with yeah any of this other stuff like if we have proclivities toward addiction that's going to show up whether that's on our devices whether that's with a substance whether that's with food and that's part of what we've been trying to change some of the conversation on maybe is helping at least church folks to see that addiction is so much deeper than just oh there's that Homeless drug addict that has bruises all up and down their arms right like we all have these proclivities to find escapes and really try to figure out who we are outside of Jesus right no that's so good dude wow even saying broadening the addiction definition for many people right as you mentioned like people when they hear addiction they just think this homeless drug addict and we're all addicted to something and so if we didn't wanted to do a study on coffee dude Justin you would probably be an addict you would yeah what you're you're addicted to coffee never to say the least I'm addicted to Pizza so like I cannot go to sleep unless I have a slice of pizza like I just love pizza right but no the point that I'm making here is the point that I'm making here guys is that we're we're all trying to figure out who we are and I think going back to the very beginning in the Bible when God told us who he how he made us in His image and how he made us in his likeness we've been given like the stamp of approval we've been given this identity we've been given this like this blessing this trademark if you will and it's the enemy's job to remove that identity from us and to cause us to believe differently about ourselves and to make us think that there's something greater than God that's out there that can fill only what God can fill and I think that's why a lot of people end up spiraling into this addictive mentality is because they're thinking to themselves that because others are doing this and they might not serve God or they might not do this it's like oh well then I can do it too and therefore I don't need God to help me succeed in life and maybe you do succeed without God but the thing is that I've notice in the industry that I'm in people that have made numerous amounts of money are still empty and void because they have no relationship with God and so that doesn't mean that you have it all put together because you have this status quo but the reality is that we're all searching for something and that which we're searching for is the relationship with the father but what happens is that we become robbed by technology by social media Keeping Up With the Jones and seeing all these wonderful Lifestyles that are being lived out from others and friends and family and so on and so forth and then we say to ourselves why aren't we having that same experience why is that not our reality the truth of the matter is that our freedom and our joy isn't in what we get to experience but is in whom we are and who he is and so having that that solid foundation when things in life do stir up when you don't get the likes on the post when you don't get the feedback that you're looking for when your phone's dead and you don't have a phone look up in the sky look at nature right disengage from something from a moment and be present but people don't know how to be present and that's why we're so attached to our phone and the problem that I have with it is people don't even know how to have communication or Converse in an active mature with another adult that's that's interesting to think about too because I know several people that I will I B text up a storm with but then when I see them face to face it's like awkward and uncomfortable right and that I'm work I'm personally working on that right I'm I'm more of an introvert at heart and that's crazy to sound because I speak publicly I get on podcast and I go live and all that but realistically interpersonal one-on-one communication I've I've been an introvert like now when I'm comfortably around you all bets are off right I'm out of the shell but but sometimes I do think that technology has drawn that line of like of disrupting personal connection with people it's a substitute and I look I do think that again I'm not a hater of tech I think it can keep people connected like I'm grateful because like right you and I have sustained a friendship for 10 years because of our devices right and that's something that wouldn't have happened 20 years ago and so I see the good in that so let me ask a question Rob I know you and I both even though we joked at the article and mocked at it a little bit like we both know that this is a thing right internet addiction is just like any other addiction so if you had to give somebody three or four steps let's just call it three things that they could do practically speaking to start to deal with this on what would your suggestions be for somebody that might be battling internet addiction yeah that's those are some really good questions so I can't remember the lady's name and I might even have her book up here by my bedside I don't I have a few downstairs under your phone yeah but she came to our church and in her household her teenage kids even young adult kids if you will I well I guess teenage all the way up until like 18 high school they don't have any technology in their home so that there's no cell phone use there's no tablet use the only time they can get on any of those things is for school related purposes but what they've done in their home is created a culture where it's quality time spent with one another so there's activities it's like whether they're playing ping pong together they're playing board games together they're very interactive with one another and so what they've done is they've removed technology for the simple purposes because they seen the damage that it does to the home over a long period of time and I think where many of us fail is that we don't acknowledge that we have a problem and so many of us will be listening to this right now and say well what I looked at those four yeah I fit here I fit there but I don't see it as a problem I pay my bills on time I clean my home I'm responsible etc but let me ask you this question first I want to challenge you by removing your device from your nightstand at night and charging it downstairs put all your devices downstairs in the basket or in a basket if you don't have a two-story home and the first thing that I want you to do when you wake up for an hour if you can do this don't even look at your phone right spend time with the Lord okay or make breakfast eat breakfast maybe pray spend some time in prayer but don't look at your phone okay another thing that I would do as a step or a process in doing like this is having accountability right so you can't do these things on your own you need account accountability in anything in life right so you can tell yourself one thing but it's another thing when you say hey look I need you to hold me accountable in this area in your life and so whether that's your spouse significant other since they're in the same home as you that some somebody that I would do to reach out to that but then also another step is to check your social medias only in the morning and then in the evening thing right so it's like when you're at work be present be at work and I think the thing is that what we've missed out on in life and I think something that my son's brought me to my brought to my attention is like when he was in the car the other day and he saw these homeless people his heart really broke but he was just present looking outside just looking at nature and he saw a need and he's like I can be a solution to that need I want to help these people I think when presently engaged with culture and Society we can be active in being the solution as God's hands and feet to bring about a better community and also just bring about his word and his ministry right and so I think technology can be good as a resourceful thing but it could also be very damaging because it in it takes us away from doing the work of the ministry Yeah you mentioned you mentioned the whole functioning right piece and that's a term we hear a lot the functioning addict and Tech is definitely one of those areas where it's easy to be a functioning addict and like you said a few minutes ago well I'm pay my bills life is good everything's fine but I think the theme that I heard you saying there is that I may be tolerating this or I may be functioning in this but these are all the things that it's potentially robbing me of and we don't notice what we don't notice right and so there's so much else that we could possibly interactions opportunities things just the beauty of Nature and and I've even it's interesting I've even tried to like there's been seasons of my social media posting right and I know this is going to sound counter intutive because we're talking about internet addiction sometimes the post is like well what can I put up that's going to get the most reactions rather than just simply saying what type of beauty do I see in my life that I can share with the rest of the world for a moment right nobody likes it but what I'm forcing myself to do in those moments is train myself to see the beauty that's around me right and so you talked about self-awareness right and then just some practical steps to like putting your phone elsewhere doing some of that to break that cycle and that phone is that like right we don't have to get in the car we don't have to go down the street or get on a plane we can escape right on our couch like I'm completely gone from the world around me in just a moment it actuallyy challenged me on this we had a conversation about this because I am on my phone a lot and I think about this internally and like Ashley challenged me on the message that it's sending and so really the question was well you're working all the time I'm like well no I'm not I'm I'm home I work for from home I have my office is in my backyard so setting those work life balance boundaries and I don't buy into the work life balance that most people buy into like I think there are going to be seasons of hustle and there are going to be seasons of rest versus I look at work like balance in the macro rather than the micro what I'm saying and so I don't expect like my everyday is going to be perfect but what she said to me she said you're working all the time and I said I'm not like in the evenings I'm I'm pretty much done I'm chilling and she's like well during the day you're on your phone and you walk to the house to get a coffee during the evening you're on your phone and you walk through the house to get her the coffee and I don't know whether you're working or you're not working and the kids don't know whether you're working or you're not working because you're on the device and you're looking at something and we don't want to interrupt you or disrupt your work and so we don't engage as much because we don't really know because the message you're sending and that and I'm working on that man I'm not going to say that I got it all dialed in managing social media not just for the podcast but also for I got my church page on there I've got a couple clients and so constantly thinking about notifications being able to engage and respond to comments for the sake of work and having to set those boundaries because I realized that having it in my hand is sending a message whether I think it is or not well just say something to me just stop me well we don't want to disrupt your work so on one hand I'm asking them to be respectful and respect my boundaries so that I can work when I'm on work but on the other hand I'm not respecting their boundaries and making it clear when I'm not working and that's the challenge of digital addiction right in social media interaction it's like man that was therapy right there oh my gosh I think it's crazy though man cuz it's like when you call somebody else out on it like I remember there's been times where I've called my wife out on it and she's like her initial response will be like well you're you're on it too like yeah you and so we that's when it's a problem when you even accept like correction and she's done it to me and I've done the same right like I'll just immediately like just like well you've done it and so it's like we're so quick to blame the other person and I think that's a Telltale sign that you're addicted to something if you put blame on someone else rather than taking the responsibility yourself no one else got you there like I spent so many years of my addiction blaming the cards that I was dealt as to why I chose to pick up drugs when the reality is the cards that I was dealt was an opportunity for me to catapult into my next opportunity right like it was never meant to restrict me or restrain me from unleashing who I really was even though I didn't have a relationship with the Lord at the time those were opportunities for me to be vulnerable and reach out and say I want help I don't know how to handle this is very foreign to me but what I've chose to do is I said man this stinks my dad was never there my mom was never there I lost my grandmother I'm homeless I got kicked out there therefore I'm going to do X Y and Z and so we get beat down throughout our days from our everyday work whether our boss tells us something whether you dealt with the customer at the gas pump or whatever it may have been or wherever you're at right and then you utilize oh man I've had such a long day therefore what I need to do I need to escape I got to check out I need to De press and so we make this the norm now as this place of like as if this is our place of rest and so we said what God you're not that important for me to say I need to spend time with you in this moment when I'm on my phone it's like this actually helps me feel a lot better where's our affirmation coming from it's not there because it's a quick dopamine release that we get from a post or a like that we see and then when that's gone we're like refresh did somebody like it I just posted it a minute ago refresh did some like it yet five minutes later refresh did somebody like it yet that was me I'm sorry like I'm going to be transparent I'm probably speaking to a lot of people right now nobody would be willing to admit this but it's like did I reach anybody did I reach any no nothing and so like I'm just waiting for this release and God's like no dude the only way you're gonna find completeness is if you find completeness in me this is why Paul said godliness with contentment is great gain but we lost the value of who God is in our lives and who God is in general he's the creator of the universe he's the Alpha and the Omega the beginning and the end the author and the finisher of our faith he's the one that put everything into existence why not be in awe of who he is yeah let that be the time when we want to escape from reality to look up at creation and say thank you Lord for getting me through this day and letting your grace be the vehicle to get me through this opport or the struggle or whatever it may have been that you went through but no what we do we turn to man and man always lets us down that's right yeah and Man created the vice but God gave man the what it's like what in Hebrews when the author of Hebrews says you spend more time I think it's in chapter three you spend more time worshiping the creation than the Creator right wow yeah that's really good so now we've we've we've essentially become addicts to the idols in our lives and so we're addicted to the idol yeah and we're looking for this Idol to Cast Away all the pain the anxiety the fear the whatever it may be and say do it and God's like throw away those Idols worship no other God but me yeah that phone give you the comfort that you're looking for so now these people are putting these ranks and now they're like dang what am I to do how I how am I to overcome these things and so I'm sorry I just went on rant there no that was a really good rant and I think you you hit the nail on the head like where are we getting our affirmation from right like where is that coming from and it should come from the Lord but also from God's people right and so having those people in our life that speak into to us and are able to build us up and encourage us but then also knowing how to get that from the Lord when we don't get it from people right David I think it was said I encourage myself in the Lord like learning how to do that and not have to go to the Internet or go to anything for affirmation internet just happens to be the addiction that we're talking about today and it's an easy one because like outside of our post being pulled down and the Facebook algorithm punishing the S out of our addiction page social media likes are easy to get like I know what to do to tweak the algorithm and that's probably part of the reason why there are some struggles in engagement because it's like I don't want to post this stupid antidotal crap that doesn't help anybody but gets 375 likes I don't really care about that so much like I want to give people something that if they get a hold of the information it becomes Revelation and it can change their life and so it's like am I speaking like in regards to marketing am I speaking to the algorithm or am I trying to speak to people and unfortunately sometimes speaking to people doesn't necessarily trigger the algorithm and so we post for response what I'm saying rather than just posting to really make a difference and I know I went on a tangent there but that ties back to what we're talking about right like where are we getting the affirmation from if only one person hears right is it worth the investment of my time if one life has changed absolutely so that was but there's that category list again for those that maybe came on late we've been talking about this study that introduces internet addiction and I encourage you when the live is over to go back and check some of this out but man I do think that this was a really powerful discussion and so I'm going to go throw my phone in the garbage can when I get off of this [Music] [Music] [Music] conviction let it settle in baby no I think yeah Holy Spirit I wouldn't have went here if I known you were gonna convict me this was for other people right this wasn't supposed to be for me no the thing is Justin is like especially for younger people and I think for us as adults or further along in life if you will we need to put up the warning signs for these individuals that are stepping into this because they're going to be blindsided yeah and I think the thing is it's the same way that the prophets were trying to speak to the children of Israel throughout history and they just refused to hear what the prophets had to say right like they were giving them warning after warning and so it's like I feel like the Lord utilizes these type of studies to be like warning signs for us to like look come back to me right like stop running away from me like there needs to be a moment in your life where you realize that everything that you're pursuing even after it's been accomplished and even after you've achieved the goals that you've set for your life it still will never be enough until you find yourself complete in me and so this is something that I'm learning to understand more each day it's like whether I'm financially free whether I obtain the home that I've always wanted whether I get the cars that I want to like or go on vacations and all these things those things are great right and they give off great memories but also give me a sense of like gratitude when it's completed or said and done but the reality is that as time goes by those things are gone right and I can reflect back on those things but the reality is in those moments all I really have is God yeah right that's the only thing that I really truly have because Paul says we enter in this world with nothing we leave this world with nothing right job talks about he bless the God who gives and takes away right and so like we have nothing yet we have everything yeah and so I think the message that I generally want to get across right now when it comes to the addiction World in a whole is stop looking outside of yourself but look within and allow the Holy Spirit to illuminate your path and give you Direction give you guidance and be the comforter that he was supposed to be yeah or that he is right he God said that or Jesus said he's going to send us the comforter the paraclete right the our Helper but we're not letting God Comfort us yeah we're looking for comfort in the wrong areas and so like for me it's like I'm I'm acknowledging this and I'm like wow like I've just neglected the very thing that's supposed to bring value to my life yeah I think about that a little deeper too as a dad man like I was Googling over here while you were talking because I was trying to find the source for the quote but I heard somebody say a long time ago what parents allow or do in moderation children will do in excess and I know that's not there's no absolute statements right not well there are absolute statements but in that regard it's not an absolute statement right doesn't necessarily mean that our kids are going to do everything that we do but we influence our children a lot and so like we're trying to help like my daughter right now she got her iPhone for the first time and we waited until we don't do the ages in our home like it's when you're mature enough we think you're mature enough to handle it that's when you're going to get a device and and for Chloe she had been she had been showing a lot of leadership and a lot of maturity in her life and so we were like she's starting to build some friendships and it's awkward to have a 14-year-old tell her friends to text her mom like it's just not happening so we want to help encourage that but I'm also I Apple has all these incredible screen time restrictions and features like their parental controls are next to none they're great and so I'm setting all these boundaries for her but then like man inwardly at the last couple weeks since she's got her device like I've been thinking about my excess right as I'm setting boundaries for her more is caught than is taught right and so I can put these screen time boundaries in place but if she just watches me all the time scrolling thumbing through and then I'm like on the other hand hey dude stay off your device like man look I know I'm a parent there are things that I do that she can't do but in principle like I'm helping her to build discipline and build her relationship with technology in either a healthy or an unhealthy way and so that's good dude that's really good for those that are on right now man if you have a chance if you can just smash the like button maybe leave a comment hit share to help encourage the algorithm