Why You Can’t Recover Alone

when the higher power is named as Jesus and there's that strong community focus right like that seems to be a huge catalyst right for change they were showing like more of a 30% success rate guys it's Justin Franage here and I just wanted to welcome you to another episode of rebuilding life after addiction and but I'm excited to sit down cuz we're in a new season we're yes transitioning just what like six days out from stepping away from our role as lead pastors at Brookside Church. And Yes. fun. It's good. Yeah. Nerve-wracking, too. It is. Yeah. But, when that the season's done, you're ready to move on, you just have to roll with it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Stepping out in faith, too. coming back to Teen Challenge and it being, 4 years or so since we've done this, we've been in the pastoring space and now rebuilding Teen Challenge, really from the ground up again. there's some foundation and whatnot, but that little bit of the last conversation saying the next Yes. Right. Right. And so, yeah, how do you feel about that transition so far and your hope for the next season with Teen Challenge and all that jazz? Yeah, I'm super optimistic. I think just knowing that it was all good the last season and being at Brooksad was great and we learned a lot of things that we didn't know or hadn't walked through before. And so now walking back into Teen Challenge and just with a different look at it or a different place where we've grown and the ministry's grown and just stepping back in just a new like blank canvas. Yeah. Yeah. So, it's just exciting to be able to go forward and know that yeah, there's going to be good things that come. Yeah. It's even still like even though there's like there's stability right now, but it's like working in Teen Challenge is this it's a missionary lifestyle, right? and so there's no nobody writing a paycheck each week. we're the directors, and so trusting on the Lord and other people to come along and support us, there's always that pit in the stomach, coming down that roller coaster, right? And so, yeah, but feeling confident though that it's the right time and the right thing to do, like it helps with that pit, like I feel confident that it's going to pan out, ? It's Yeah, just reassurance in that. So, what do you think about even being away from recovery ministry for four years now and coming back into the world like I don't know anything different anything stick out like not really anything different the landscape's changed right after co things got crazy for recovery centers and teen challenges much like I think when we left in 2019, we I looked at some old board minutes and we had around 40 students in the program and like seems crazy. Today there's seven. And so it's it's interesting because that season they walked through with co my parents were in charge. They did the best they could considering all the external forces that controlled things. But like looking at that again it's like are we aiming to go back to 40 or 50 students again? Are we, maybe building things a little differently this time around? yeah. Have you thought anything about that? Yeah, I think so. And we've chatted about this just a little bit of like it may be the less number, but in 40 compared to seven, that sounds much easier because 40 people is a lot, right? And so there's just so much more to do. but being at seven like you can really go instead of wide to go deep and really going deep is where the disciplehip will truly take place to where it's like hey I am not going back to that lifestyle I can really focus on the heart issues and and the reason why they went into addiction in the first place. So being able to take that time and go the extra go the extra step to dig deep. Yeah. Yeah. Instead of wide. Yeah. One of the things I'm excited about doing even with like a more emphasis on this podcast and we're here by the way at the table 61 and one of their storefronts. It's called the green room and our friends Jason and Crystal and the crew over here have allowed us to set up this space here. It's great. Not just for us to use but for others. And we're hoping to do some stuff personally, stepping out doing some recording and podcasting for folks. But I took a lot of pictures the first time around. Like I've got 20 years almost, maybe not 20, but I've got years of photos on my phone. But one of the things I'm excited about doing this time around as we've rebuilt is documenting the journey, right? talking even talking through this now, 40 students to seven, figuring this out, right? And sharing, some of the real stuff along the way, and we've been back at this now for a few months. And I don't know that the 12 13 years that we were involved before we never had a fundraiser as successful as the Josh Baldwin concerts. Yeah, that was fun. Like craziness. Almost 1500 people across two locations and seeing God's people show up and invest $50,000 into the ministry. Yeah, it was amazing when we had six people in the program. Like it was in my mind I'm like why never that level of investment with 50 people? No, right. like we're scrambling, but it just goes to show me that like it doesn't like it really doesn't matter how many people you're helping, right? As long as you're helping somebody. Yeah. you're faithful with that and God will be faithful on the other side. I've got these Google alerts set on my phone now where any addiction recovery like faith-based recovery stories like Google's alerting me now when new stories are published. And so I get to pull these things up and take a look at them. And I get an email like once a week with like a digest and I saw one on there that was I think it was the National Institute of Health recently did a study. They were talking about faith-based programs. They actually did the study in connection with the Latter-day Saints which is obviously not our doctrine and not what we believe by any stretch of the imagination false teaching and all that jazz. But they were talking about the 12step programs that have a spiritual component in them and how they were showing like more of a 30% success rate with some of the AA 12step groups which are when the higher power is named as Jesus and there's that strong community focus right like that seems to be a huge catalyst right for change and I'm just thinking back over the years and some of the groups of students that stick out, right, over the years that we've we've done in ministry and like there are names that I can recall, right, that I can't recall without thinking about another person that they were close with. Right. And those people that tend to be doing better now that they're still connected. Right. And what what's been your experience? What have you seen over the years that has like where you see people connect, that's helped you help them stay the course, right? And I guess women have that tendency more to like have those like clicky things, I guess. But gosh, I can remember so many times when someone wanted to leave one of the ladies and like we just like they would grab their one person and then that one person would grab another person and be "Hey, let's let's support her. Let's get around her. Like she can't leave this program. if she does, like we don't know if she's gonna make it till next week. it's one of those serious things. Or they're struggling because their kids are at home and they're missing them. And so it's hey, they would grab their their bestie in the program and then that person would grab someone else. And then and then like we're all rallied around this one person. And so, just feeling the connection, the community, the support, and knowing that like we are cheering that person on. We're cheering that lady on. Like you can make it. we'll stand by you and we'll pray you through it and we will hold your arms up, we will help you get through it and until the next call on the phone when you get to speak to your kids. Yeah. and then, maybe after the call then it's another like crying, I need to go home. Well, let's do it until the next week. We'll pray and help you through it till the next week. And so, just being able to rally around one another and to to listen through the tears, . that's good. Yeah. A couple times like there would be deaths, right? a student would receive the news of there was a death of a good friend or something. And so those are the times that we had to really rally around each other and support. I remember gosh one certain instance and the staff member like literally like I would go down during the day and sit with the lady and as she just cried and we just like process things and then the other staff member would sit with her at night time like cuz she couldn't sleep. It was just devastating. her world outside of Teen Challenge being just ripped open, I guess you would say, just broken. And so then having to walk through that in the Jesus way, not running back to the drugs to numb the feelings. And so like day and night, we sat with her, we we prayed with her, we just watched movies together. Really was just like bringing that community and holding each other up through the hard times. And those are the relationships that stuck. we walked together through this hard stuff and, we're going to continue to walk with you through the good stuff, too, and so just continuing that relationship and just being hey, we might be two states away now, but hey, that's why we have Facebook and Messenger and all these things and FaceTime, that we can use to stay in contact. Yeah. Yeah. As you were talking about that, I the verse in Matthew 11 28-30 popped into my mind. I love on the message translation. It says, "Are you tired, worn out, burnt out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you'll recover your life." I'll show you how to take a real rest. I love that difference because it's not I have a tendency to when I need rest to isolate, right? And I'm really good at that. I do a great job isolating from people like as much as I enjoy being in front of people, I don't mind doing it. like I love, being around crowds. I also really enjoy being a loner. which seems weird, but that's my life. But Jesus goes on to say, this is the message, Eugene Peterson's translation, the paraphrase, it says, "Walk with me, work with me, watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace, right? I won't lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me, and you'll learn to live freely and lightly." Right? and that piece right there unforced, right? I won't lay anything heavy or ill-fitted on you. And I think a lot of times we struggle to engage in community cuz of the either spoken or unspoken expectations of that community. And so we step into a community and it's like what are they going to require out of me? Mhm. And that's not like giving and serving like shouldn't be because of somebody else's expectations, right? It should be because God has, set this thing on your heart. It's it's it's out of a cheerful heart, right, that we're choosing to serve. And I think even in the recovery world, right? right? right? What are they going to think about me? Mhm. There's this expectation that if I don't lay this all down and I don't like I should have the anorexia and not need accountability to the bathroom or the bulimia or whatever, right? I should have that fixed day one coming into the program. And so I we've watched that over the years staff members hey, it's three weeks. I still got to go to the bathroom with them. Like what I'm saying, right? And so we can even put these expectations on people to change quicker. And like and so waiting into a community of people who know how to walk in these unforced rhythms of grace, right? Like is the challenge, right? Yeah. And actually had before I had walked through a lot of those things, I never struggled with the anorexia or bulimia. And so like in my thigh at first I was dude, this should be easy, right? like let's just do it and you'll be good. And but really learning the depths of it like working through workbooks with ladies working through the situation and and really like oh my gosh this is so much more and so much deeper than like hey in one day sure there could be a miracle and that could happen. Yeah, absolutely. But like what we saw was just it was the everyday renewing their mind like Yeah. just walking it out and having the accountability to support them. Yeah. Yeah. That's really good. I just love that first verse and the way this is written. Are you tired, worn out, burnt out on religion? Right? I'll show you how to take a real rest. And I'm I'm working on learning those rhythms in my own life. Even now I don't think this learning process of because there's so many things that become impetive to community and an impediment right like that become an issue with us engaging in community whether it's expectations whether it's offense right there's so many so many little things that can trip it up and like in every season of life like it's different and I even sitting here in the table I think out on like Jason saying over and over like we just want a group of people that do life together and I think that's what TC has always been right they say you're not supposed to become great friends with the staff but like try not to when you're together all the time right like who else is going to sit up with me at 3 o'clock in the morning after I finished doing drug test with students and searching dorms on that type of community it's Yeah, that's where relationships form. Yeah. Yeah. And so I think I don't know maybe that's the circling this back around. Maybe that's where we're heading going forward, right? It's, if God sends us 60 people and we get a huge campus and we can do a large scale teen challenge again then and we can do it with community and great, but if we continue to run 8 to 10 students and that's one of the things I'm just looking at because I've said to you over and over, I don't want to do it the same way. And not that it was all bad. We had some great moments. Yeah. But it's like it's a different season. I'm different. You're different. And like I'm just praying into that in this season like God, how do we do this well and not sacrifice community? And that's one of the challenges. How do you scale community? Churches struggle with it. We had 15 staff members at one point. How do you build intimate connection with 15 leaders, right? how do you build intimate connection with 60 students? And I don't necessarily believe people who say they figured it out at scale like that because like Jesus only had 12, right? And like he was the son of God. And so I think there's layers to it. I think there's there's decisions to pour into certain people. Those people pour into other people and there's a like a community that way, right? But like that was one of the things I think I do regret the first time around was like not thinking about how to scale community right like so it is significant and deep right and yeah and I think it's when it's like I think we could think too hard too like yeah like what is the step by step to do this but like and then not let it just naturally happen as well. Of course, we had to take some time and be well, let's, this person should be like head over this and so let's really pour into them like you said and then they'll pour into others. But then a lot of times I think it's just like naturally can happen when you have the person who has the same heart, who is hey, I want to go after this with you. And so it's not hey, let's intentionally do this, but it just naturally overflows. Yeah. Yeah. That's really good. Yeah. Yeah. I always wonder like I saw on Instagram real a few weeks ago and it was it was this smattering together of clips of like all these different church leaders like talking about their small groups program and how they're unique and it's individual and like all it was like 30 different churches back to back. We're going to get in circles, not rows. Circles, not what I'm saying? And it was the same thing being said. Ah, by all these places, all these different tradition, but they weren't connected, right? Oh, funny. And so, even that trying to systematize community, right? Like it's yeah, how will it be successful? And then, yeah, not letting it just happen. So, yeah, it's just let letting things letting the community grow organically, right? and really leaning into that in this season and I think it's gonna be good. so we've got a couple things coming up I wanted to talk about. Right. So we've got Ben Fuller. Yeah. Super cool. Are you excited about that? I am. Yeah. I'm learning his songs, right? Because it's I hate going to a concert where I don't know any of the songs. So I know like two, but like I'm really listening to his playlist so that I can be in the songs, not just seeing the concert. He's got that country sound too. He does. And that's a new Brandon Lake has done some country style music. That's like a new thing. It is. It's like Yeah. Yeah. Which is funny. I don't know if everyone's going country. I particularly don't like country music. And so the girls say that. Sorry. Ben's coming. Okay. I'm just kidding. But I do love that music. Anyway, but my girls are going, our girls are going on a youth retreat and one of the nights they do spirit nights is cowgirl or cowboy nights or they can do country club so they can pick whether they're going to be cowboy or preby. Yeah. Yeah. I'm going to ask Ben I'm going to try to get I'm reach out to them and try to see if I can sit down with Ben. I think that'll be fun for the podcast. Yeah. like I don't get these names in too often and Right. but take advantage of that. Yeah. And it's been fun. We haven't done a lot of promotion. Tickets are starting to sell. All good. And so that's going to be good. If you're by the way, like if you want to be involved in the concert, there's a couple different ways you can do it for our local folks. You can certainly purchase a ticket, but there's also sponsorship packages and I'm really excited about those for both churches and businesses. So, if you're interested in sponsoring the concert, we have different levels. Some of them include like your name on the flyer, your business name on the flyer. In addition to that, some of the packages include us mentioning you on the social media platforms, which is great because I think across both Teen Challenge and my personal platforms right now, we have an audience of around 25 to 30,000 people. Awesome. Which is crazy. and so we'll be happy to also promote your business. For those of you who run businesses, it's not just a donation. It can also be an expense because it's an advertising deal as well. and you get to support Teen Challenge. And so I'm excited about that. The again I'm still like on cloud nine from Josh Bowwin and there's like this pressure like it's got to be better, right? And like I had like my fang girl moment on the stage with Josh and so I think I'll be all right with Ben. I'll be a little more reasonable, right? But like it just pinched myself like what the heck it's happening. Yeah. But Ben's got an incredible addiction testimony and and I'm excited about that and yeah, I think it's going to be good. And I also think going forward we're we're going to be booking Sunday morning services again. And so whether that is us individually coming out to speak, well not us she'll come and sit and watch and shake your hand. But but if you're interested in having us come out and share and testimony and also deliver a sermon, deliver my story or whatever your needs are, we'd love to bring Teen Challenge back out to do some of that. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah. And so let I'm going to ask you a question and I think this is going to be good for the podcast and then also we'll pull some clips out of it later but like monthly support like I wanted to get your feedback like what are like how important is it and what has some of the struggles been like not having that over the years. Sure. And get some of that conversation going. Yeah. Well, reality is, right? Everyone has bills and they have things to to pay for and we can think about gas and rent and heat and all that stuff, but like really focusing on like guess get guess the extras too. And so like a program can be a program, but also can be enjoyable. And so it's not just sponsoring the basics everyday stuff, but it's is sponsoring the experience. And so yeah, your support is so needed just to really just bring the program full circle, to be involved in every aspect, the fun stuff, the hard stuff, the curriculum stuff, the things that they have to do in the program, but also the stuff that make it just full for the student and the family to be involved. Yeah. Yeah. It's good. But I was talking to somebody the other day about how our social media team actually and I were talking about how difficult it is to raise support on the internet for men. Like he was mentioning that people like save the children, right? I get the St. Jude's YouTube ads all the time. Well, the puppies and like Alanis Morsette with SPCA for years, right? Or was it her? I have no idea. It's one of those artists, Sarah McLaclin, one of them. I will remember you. Remember that? I guess it was sad. It made you cry. But like I get the St. Jude's research commercials, right? And like it's just and it should be like it's kids, right? Nobody argues with that. But like 30 year old men that don't get the same, right? Yeah. But you have to remember that it's 30 year old men, but it's also their kids who were at home. It's their mom and dad who's taking care of their kids while they're here. And so it's it's more than just, hey, yeah, just in the program, but it's like you are supporting and you are backing men who need to take care of their families and who are going back to be the dad that they need to be and not just someone who's strung out or not even there, but someone who's present and that's what you're supporting. Yeah, that's good. And we're creating the community. Right. Right. that's really what it is. It's this time Jeff Keane talks about this a lot. He says that, you're not stopping your life. You're not ending your life. this isn't the end, right? You're just pressing pause. Sure. On everything from the outside, right? You're pressing pause while you clean the house up so you can finish the movie, right? and that's that's what this season is. And so that monthly support, it's not just you're giving them in. Yes. and I think one of the benefits I see about monthly support, especially with the way our program's structured, is that these guys are going to work a month five. So, really we're asking people to support. We're taking four months. We're getting them on their feet and then they're going to be contributing to their own recovery pretty soon into this process, right? So, you're investing into their future and man, a student gets to month five, they start earning money, they get the chance to send something home to their kid, to their strange wife or maybe, the divorce wife or whatever, right? And they start or pay back their parents, right? And like it really is an investment in the future and I love that. I wanted to hear your thoughts on the whole giving to men thing cuz like people it was easier to raise funds with the women's home. Sure. And I'm not opening a women's home so we can raise funds easier. That's a bad reason to do it. But when we had the women's home, it was easy. Yeah. And it was and I think it's it's good to see that other perspective. It's not just the men. Yes. They matter. Sure. But there's a family behind them. There's kids. There's a mom and all of that. And we're helping them become who they need to be. Right. Absolutely. So awesome. Well, this has been fun. Yeah. Good times. Did you have anything else? No. Thoughts, comments, snarks? No, I think I'm good. Well, thank you guys for jumping in. It was fun to have this not It was fun to have this conversation on community and yeah, we're just excited to have, the opportunity to keep putting these episodes out. I'm really looking forward to the future with the podcast. I've got some phenomenal conversations coming out. We've got one coming out this Monday. this one will come out soon after and well, you don't know that because when you see this, it'll be the first time, but our plan is to get at least an episode out every Monday and and so you can look forward to that on the YouTube channel. Please, if you're here, hit the like button, subscribe, and we would love for you to leave a comment. The comments help share this with your network as we continue to grow. And really the mission, right, with Teen Challenge, we want to put hope within reach of every addict. one of the things that I've seen for a long time is the necessity of social media, right? The necessity of podcasting, video stuff to reach a broader audience. Sure. And I think that's the part like having these conversations, drawing people into the community. So, please engage with us. We'd love to chat. if you'd like to support the ministry, we've got the Ben Fuller concert coming up and we've also got our monthly support program, Team Hope. So, if you'd like to be involved in either of those, I'll drop the link in the description. And thank you again for joining us and we'll see you soon.