He Rebuilt His Life After Addiction - This Is How

I've asked a couple therapists and counselors this question I'm not against them how many patients do you have and give 50 or 100 or whatever out of all of them can you tell me one patient you have a game plan for in a year or two to be completely free hey guys thanks for jumping into another episode of rebuilding life after addiction it's Justin Fran here I'm here with Rob Reynolds on a consistent longtime guest I'm trying to talk him into just co-hosting with me because then I don't have to introduce him every time as a guest because you're really not a guest anymore and man I wanted to get on and talk to you today a little bit just have a conversation on man you and Seth were on here earlier just chopping it up that was fun I got a bunch of great footage that we'll probably use hold that against me right but talk about sobriety and recovery and as Christians we really lean into the new life concept right and knowing that we're New Creations in Christ so we're not who we used to be the past is going completely new creatures and one of the things I think I see a lot of people struggle with is that they we've talked about this before they go back to their old life and end up finding themselves right back into the place of addiction again because they haven't built a new life that's worth staying sober for yeah and I really want to dive into that a little bit like what does that look like what does it look like to build a brand new life that's actually worth staying sober for because I hear heard all the time when I first got say Jesus is in me but like here I am I'm told I'm this new creature but I walk back into my life that I'm coming out of right and man everything is there's just as much pain as there was before I gave my heart to Jesus there's just as much wreckage from before I gave my heart to Jesus some of the relationships I used to have I can't even reach out to them bank account is on zero credit score is like a two what I'm saying and like now all a sudden woohoo I'm in recovery and I got to clean up the pile of mess and what does that look like so let's just talk about you for a second because that's fine how did you start that process coming out of prison kyus prison Ministries right God got a hold of your life you are falling in love with him then you got to start cleaning the wreckage up what did that look like for you man when I got saved in prison this pastor gave me this scripture and I'm just a person I literally had to put it in my shoes and walk on when it says stand on the word of God I did because again I had PR still which I had Pearl fees I was working at luckily I went through a program called House of Miracles so I had a place I got taught the word of God I got discipled for a year much like a Teen Challenge it was a little more intimate personal but same concept and but then I graduated and really didn't have any money saved up I bought a car during that time so but I still had child support of almost $600 a month and I was making back then minimum wage was like eight bucks I think it's making $8 an hour and literally huh it's big money yeah get your big back today exactly it's about it and then I got my own apartment and so I had an apartment my car was paid off because I just got like a little cheap car but I had bills and I had child Sport and I had peole and I had all that and it's like trying to do that and that's always I think that transition period is always the hardest to make it through it's usually where everybody it gets too tough and they just give up they like well I can hustle and make money I don't want to struggle and the reality of that season though is exactly what you said we have to understand we spent years destroying early we spent years causing wreckage and debris and Carnage everywhere that we're going to have to take time yeah and so in that cleaning up process we was talking about this earlier like learning character and integrity and honesty and you said how to be a man learning how to really be a masculine man like I don't mean that but like a Biblical masculine man that will stand and trust the Lord so that scripture was Proverbs 35 and6 trust the Lord with all your heart lean not on your own understanding acknowledge Him in all your ways and he'll direct your PA yeah so I had to stick him in my shoes every day get up luckily I lived really like right across from where I worked my apartment was here and Christian restaurant was there but I worked I gu 80 90 hours a week and then on the days that I had off during the day I mowed grass during the day like I just became responsible which is what most of us in addiction are and isn't that hard though you think about it I can make 20 in 20 minutes flip in a bag or whatever right whatever you want to call I don't even know what lingo they're using these days is that the right word to use I don't know I all these crazy slate terms these days but man when I can do something out of character or let me say it this way I could do something in ungodly character and make 30 make three times four times whatever ear in the week in a couple hours versus I got to go over here and I got to work two jobs just to get the hole get out of the hole I'm in that's not even like enjoying life yet no and so man what type of grit does it take dependence on the Holy Spirit whatever word you want to use there right to be able to like say the easy path isn't necessarily the right path right that like man eventually that time that I'm saving I could end up paying for that in a prison cell down the road and what did that so you said you were grinded out working 80 hours a week right how did you how did you stay committed to that process because I knew like I knew in most of us in addiction like we were committed to our addiction right what like I just talked about it I read my daughter's little Barbie bicycle across we're still going to we are going to rect but I drove a P with flowers and hold on we got to pause for a second because that is a real that will go viral okay and I need to go viral so this podcast hits people so better at your expense than mine that we go what I'm saying I don't care no got no shame in my Jesus game but that you that commitment man like that grind that hustle to do the wrong thing and then trying to like pull that in and like I think the difference there is that with addiction it's instant gratification right so I feel the high the moment I start and or maybe not even the high I numb the pain immediately whereas on the other side of it coming out of it's like I have to lean in into the pain I heard somebody say I think it was Jord Jordan Peterson talked about this all the life is suffering and when you realize that you learn to approach life that there is going to be suffering there's nothing apart from life that whatever it is every pie of life it's it's learning how to cope with yeah and find a version of yourself that can live in the suffering yeah and I think that's the thing I hate about the Prosperity Gospel is like God's going to make you happy healthy and Rich and it's like he's going to cause you to come and die yeah like you're going to have to give some things up life is going to suck for a little bit before it gets better especially when you have to deal with the wreckage of yesterday I think it took me man probably six seven years to get my credit score squared away because you go to Ministry yeah and like it doesn't pay very well I got mon straight in the ministry ruined it again in the beginning well that's another story because I did the same thing I signed off on loans for the ministry when we were building it and I don't don't recommend doing that by the way that is not advice not Financial advice smart with freedom house when I first started Le but so starting to build some of that right on the other end when did when do you feel like in your journey man that like man I got a life that I'm happy that I'm living I was happy because I was free but at the same time like all of that went on I remember a year or so after I got out I finally got U my weekend visitations with my kids and I started to get that and I had an apartment and then I met my wife now and we got married and got a little Farmhouse and she started a Christian daycare and I started working with her right before like a year or two before we started the freedom house and I remember like when I walked out of the corporate kind it was a Christian restaurant but it was still a business you when I walked out of that and we started a Christian Daycare it was actually the first Ministry that we jumped into and I remember like not I don't mean this in a bad way for anybody that's doing it but not having to work for somebody else understanding I'm working for the Lord and we're training kids to know Jesus because we prayed at every meal we taught them Bible studies we used other like the Bible app the kids Bible we taught them things we would teach them about Jesus and it just felt really good would like to how many people you think coming out of the life that we came out of have really been called to be entrepreneurs oh and what I'm saying perverted that yeah it's there and that's why they don't end up doing what they're what I'm saying they don't end up finding their purpose because they go me a trudge off they work for somebody else or even somebody said they call it the other word for it's entrepreneur and so it's I'm coming to work for you so that I can learn what you do and I'm going to benefit I'm going to grow your business I'm I'm going to take that level of ownership while I'm working for you and that's one of the things I think that is missing a lot especially in culture man like we're starting this podcast Studio I have I have in the last four days reached out to four different people of platforms and offered to record their stuff for them for not a dollar I've been paid to do this before there's no reason for me to do it for free right but the difference is that I'm willing to eat crow for a little bit Yeah willing to pay the price because it's GNA open the doors up later on and I think that's that resilience sometimes that ends up missing for those coming out of addiction we've we experienced the highs and the lows so fast and it's on what did Dave Ramsey say it this way children do what feels good yeah adults devise a plan and follow it yeah so it's that process like okay what is the plan and then how am I going to get to the other end of it and that's the commitment we don't have commitment in add we have manipulation to get what we want we don't have commitment and that's what that's that's what I said to myself we don't even know what commitment looks like because our commitment was bondage yeah our commitment was contingent on what you did for me we couldn't break the it wasn't really a commitment cuz at some point you're not choosing to be there anymore you're so trapped in this lifestyle you the chains are holding you down yeah and so it's really not commitment right it's yeah go ahead sorry deceive not like deceiving what looks like commitment in the beginning that's why me and Seth was talking about different things and strongholds and different thing I think we really When God says in Romans transform your mind you really have to take everything love commitment trust loyalty all that stuff the way we thought it was when we was in the world and literally throw it out and get back in the word learn what it really means like learn what that really means to do that it's like talking about commitment back then in the Hard Road that's the thing you have to it's a narrow road you find it yeah like the gospel does cost you something you do have to die you just choose whether you die slowly or fast but it is a walk that if you want to get past that year or two transition that's why I think the year-long programs are good I think they're they're way more effective but what about the next year when they leave like when you're actually out in the world that's the huge test yeah you're in a bubble you're around that when you're in a Teen Challenge or a freedom house or a program when you walk out of that now you got to put all of that into practice and I so I still think another year or two of that getting back on your feet learning how to function and you do have the world stigma where you're a felon or you're an addict and you what like so you're pushed over here and you're not going to get the better job and all that but you have to be able to commit to the Lord to let him work in you that's what it was for me my commitment wasn't to my kids I remember when I first got them on one of the weekends and they were up we were riding around I was taking them home and I remember Brooke I think she might have been 16 17 something like that 17 probably and she said that it's about time we have first place in your life and I get what she meant but I remember I've really made her mad she probably remembers this if she watches I said sweetie you can't have first place that's been some of the problem right God has first place and then you yeah and she said also now drugs and everything else had first place now God does I'm like yeah but the thing is if I don't keep him first and walk this with him you're not ever going to haveen that right yeah that's really good yeah I think there is that process that commitment piece my a friend of mine Chuck balamo he awesome pastor but he taught a word at one of our family weekends years ago and I'll never forget it he talked through the process of metamorphosis that a caterpillar do a butterfly goes through and the interesting part we only see the part where they come out of the Cocoon but there's like several steps and he laid them out individually the process that a caterpillar goes through to eventually become a butterfly to become transformed it's a hard process it's it's a difficult process and like the timeline it's getting our time Horizon correct right and this process is probably going to take me longer than I think it's going to take it's going to be harder than I want it to be what I'm saying but like if I do not faint right and that what the scripture says do not grow weary in doing well is dou right but the problem is we don't know when that season's going to be and it's that P patience to be able to slowly trust that this life that I'm building is going to be worth living and I think there is that part like God give me the joy of my salvation yeah let me be content in having that but specifically for men there's also a desire to build there's a desire to know that I'm making more progress right and so not to say that our Salvation isn't ever enough but there's a point where you want to start to see the fruit of the Salvation you want to start to see healing want to start to see some of Life come back together and it's getting to that place and yeah I just wish I'd had known coming out of Teen Challenge how long that was going to take well and if in scripturally speaking I was just sharing with him in First Peter 2 like it talks about the trials that we go through produce it the core genuiness of our faith going through the trials produces and so the only way to get through that time is to learn how to walk through the trials like it's not like he going be really easy from here to here and then you're good no learning how to deal with the difficulties is what really works on the inside of us to produce different character and integrity to trust the Lord like first or John 16:33 says if I misqu I'm sorry but it says I've told you these things so that in me you may have peace in him not in us and then he says although you're going to go through many trials and tribulation in this world take heart I've overcome the world right so this is where like you have to really have that craving to learn the word and really get it in you to understand okay Jesus is saying through all of the trials and all I can have peace in him so if I focus on him I can have the peace and knowing that whatever I'm going through he's already W yeah like and grounding that in you okay I can handle a fight in to get my kids back it was a year and a half process with everybody on the legal system against me right and every right to be I was an ex-felon coming out of prison me why do I deserve to get my kids back I spent four years in prison and every cop and everybody there on the other side was telling them how bad I used to be and the Lord told me this is where I learned in the beginning trust him he said be still and know that I'm God Psalm 46 then I'm like okay that soundss really good but I'm trying to get my kids back and then there's the other one you need to just let the Lord fight your battles right so and he was saying that to me and I'm talking to my pastor was praying for me and my ex-wife was of course and what I would do was try to destroy and defile my character because of what I was how and I understand a protective mom didn't want somebody like that to have her kids and I'm coming out of prison but the Lord was like and she was an addict too the Lord was like you won't say one thing about her you'll trust me and my lawyer who my dad and them paid good money to have knew all kinds of stuff and I said no we're not doing that we're not here to defile character I'm here to prove that I'm different yeah and I'm going to trust the Lord like what do you mean you're going to lose and I'm like no cuz he's on my side and that was my first like real test yeah to sit down that's why I said I put them in my shoes and I walked in that courtroom every day and I sat down made her be quiet and at the end of it I won't even get into what at the end of it the judge sded with me cuz he said I can tell you're different like out of everything that happened my character didn't shift and move to my old person there was evidence that I wasn't the same if that makes sense so he talked about the new life earlier like I we totally believe in that me but I don't think enough people really like when Nicodemus came to Jesus in John 3 like hey what do you got to do like you got to be born again we throw that term so loosely around Nicodemus say like what do you mean I got to go back in my mother's room yes like not physically but yes like you have to really be born again and when you get born again you get a brand new life right spiritually you get new life like all of that pass 2 Corinthians 5:7 old things pass away and All Things become new but if we don't take the time to get to know him through relation to his word through relation we really want not just believe it but know it to make it a stronghold like we us talking about earlier in our life that nothing else can shift us off of yeah what like good it is new life but how many people out there don't think that it really is new life because there's not enough Christians displaying new life I'm not being mean yeah no and that's that's part of that like you not the word of faith type but speaking things into existence right calling things that are not as though they are understanding believing like really getting a vision for what the life is supposed to look like and then being able to constantly and relentlessly pursue that which gives you the motivation to push through the difficulty right like if I'm not going anywhere if I don't have a destination in mind I don't have a good idea of what life should look like then what ends up happening is when like I end up facing a difficult moment facing a trial right I don't have anything to Anchor to yeah and so it's like I need to be able to have something to Anchor to and once you get a couple wins under your belt marriage the kids and stuff like that it's like no bro I got too much to lose now yeah than to go back and do that what I'm saying and really grabbing a hold of that and I think another driving factor I know for me in the middle of all that nonsense and the building and all that was really just the that gratitude piece like I'm I'm grateful like I'm alive like I don't and I think that's one of the reasons even almost 20 years later like I still share my testimony I still the one leopard that came back to his feet it's always and like it's like I'm not running from who I used to be I'm running from that life I'm not him anymore but I don't need to put that in the closet somewhere like I don't need like forget that ever happened I'll walk into we were in a room this week with all these political leaders all these powerful people and I'm wearing an addiction hat not a Maga hat even though I got one of those like but I got free from addiction hat walking around and it's like most folks a lot of folks be in a room like that I'm not wearing something like that I don't want them to know that I was an addict no let me tell you my God yeah let me tell you about this and so I think that's the mindset man I don't know where I was going with that but I think the other Avenue we need to hit on that I believe and this is what usually gets me in trouble a lot I'm fine with but it's like not just the addiction but the mental illness too what because I was bipolar manic depressive border apparently schizophrenic on 500 milligrams of cakil twice a day and I never weaned off of any of it like I was supposed to I've never been to counseling I've never been to therapy since the day that I met Jesus I got in the word and the word made me free because somebody told me to believe that and I've asked a couple therapists and counselors this question I'm not against them okay but I've asked them the same thing some that were Christians and some that were secular and I asked the same thing how many patients do you have and they'll give me 50 or 100 or whatever out of all of them can you tell me one patient you have a game plan for in a year or two to be completely free and they have no answer yeah I have my I'm like I'm in the middle in therapy so the reason for that let me explain I think some people use therapy as an excuse to not let go of something they don't really want to deal with the issue and so I'm always going to the doctor but I'm never getting well right and because there's comfort in that there's comfort in our pain sometimes because it's familiar we know it now on the other hand Ashley and I were welcome through some stuff in the last year and we were going to therapy I was going to therapy stuff whatever and both of us were going to see therapist and I don't again that's another one of those things I don't care I don't mind talking about no because it's but there came to a point where she showed up one day at her therapist I showed up one day at my therapist we're walking through these transitions dealing with two Ministries like there's just a lot of pressure and we got to this place where both therapist said you're good come see me a couple months if you need see I me and I was surprised it wasn't hey I'm going to have you keep coming and keep dragging you along no you're here it's like going to the doctor when you have an injury right you go through eight to 10 weeks of maybe you pulled a muscle there's a f there's a game right but we're getting to the end yeah and I think some people end up and I think it's the same thing with folks constantly coming in recovery programs right it's like they learn to run the program they learn how to do a program and there's never really an end goal and I think that to me man is like is really where purpose comes into play yeah like you've got to fall in love with Jesus and then let him begin to dictate your purpose yeah and that is doing everything the Bible School shares that's living the gospel out and then in that pursuit of purpose you're going to find a vocation you'll find something you're passionate about and I'm not the guy that things who should go do a job like yes there's a season where you do a job that you hate right because you got to yeah but I also think that too many people are like I can't understand it like you will run up on somebody addicted to drugs what I'm saying like selling drugs running from the all the craziness but too afraid to step out in faith for their future and it's so crazy to me how we can end up Fearless in the face of the enemy but then yet fearful about pursuing the plan of God for our life and that's something where again that transformation do not be conformed transformed by the renewing of your mind but what does the word say he's not given me a spirit of fear but of power love and self-discipline sound mind man and we can pursue those things with confidence and I'm preaching and I'm just talking but that's the goal right like I don't know and I pray even as I get older as I get more consistent and try to stay faithful to the Lord that I ever lose that boldness like the leaping at certain Ministry times where we went up and signed off on a property in faith that we had no money for like I'm sorry to the property owner for hearing that but like the confidence hey if God wants this to happen I'm going to jump forget the parachute yeah he's got a soft Landing for me and if he doesn't have a soft Landing I'm going to learn something anyways it's so good A lot of that like that was a long rant that's a pretty good one actually so it's like thinking of David I think one of us mentioned David your said or you something but it's like learning like you CHR religious people would look at David and say he was cocky I don't think he was cocky I think he was confident because of what he went through with the lion and the bear he was confident to take on the giant because he knew we talked about that like when you go through this what these trials and tribulations are for you go through the trials and tribulations to have something to look back on them what God did from me what like hold on he brought me through he I know he delivered me from drugs alcohol prison and mental illness I'm not worried about a giant in front of me now so David comes out with confidence who's the other one Gideon he Whitted it down to 300 men and then God he's still a little shaky and God says go down there and listen to the enemy's Camp he goes down and they're talking about a dream with a roll of barley rolled down the hill and knocked them over and the people's like oh cuz the Lord's with them were scared and so then he understood that the enemy even though 133,000 big to his 300 was scared and knew that the Lord was going to win so he knew that he want already knew he was going to win he goes out with 300 people with a horn and a jar with fire Holy Ghost and worship he goes out with that and they defeat God does something and they defeat all of them yeah what so like having confidence that our God but that comes from the faithfulness of him in our life that we can but if we don't go through the trial to watch and do it and we keep bowing out it we're never going to get the track record of his faithfulness in our Liv so that's why those trials produce genuine faithness because they build trust yeah with God who's always faithful but we don't know that we got to learn that through experience with him and as we do that then it's now I'm just to the point where I don't really care how many demons or what's around when Jesus stepped off the boat the whole Legion of demons said oh Jesus what do you want with us then you have kids the fear comes back that's a whole different but that's like right now I'm responsible for another life yeah like and then but it but that I think that just speaks to the point that like man like there's going to be some mess and you're going to get through that one pile of mess you're going to start to build some life back up and you're going to come into who you are as a person as a man as a woman whatever that is and then like a new season of life's going to come on and you're going to have a whole lot of stuff you don't know and then another season of life going to come and in the process as we're trusting the Lord through all of it he's shaping us and then you're going to look back man like I 20 years almost now come on Jesus like in just looking back and like I still remember what it felt like the day I walked into Teen Challenge and I'll never forget it but like me there have been Seasons there have been some struggles along the way Ministry we were talking about that early Ministry is not as easy as people say it's going to be it's like people will you better be called when you step out yeah because people will betray you they will stab you they will take advantage of you and like again it's that character Jesus right and figuring that out seasons of depression that I battle with heavy seasons depression and it's still something that I'm keeping an eye on just being aware that there going to be high highs and there going to be low lows and being aware of those things and not allowing it to pull me back to where I was before yeah and it's not my strength right and so like yes I've Got Confidence there are things that I know how to do like I get that but like it's the Lord that's been holding me together all these years yeah and more than holding me together and I think that's that's where we end up so before we wrap up the podcast man take a few minutes and just tell people about the way 146 Ministries ask them where tell them where they can support you as well and how they can find you on social media yeah so we got a Ministry we got a website up now I was just telling Justin weeks AG we actually got an app that one okay we actually got an app out now too but it's the way Ministries store either Apple or Google and download The Way Ministries 146 app all of That's Got The Giving platforms on there we have cash app we have PayPal and you can go on the website to the giving platform and he won't even charge you for the word okay so like you won't have to pay for the prophetic word if he has one he'll just give it to you no cost okay at no cost but we do we go into the jails I go into the Martinsburg EAS or Regional Jail once a week I go to the juvenile centers once a week really pouring into these young kids and discipling him they're not just getting a Bible study we're going on taking the gospel of the Holy Spirit and power going in there I'm seeing demons cast out lives getting transformed Muslims coming to Christ they're praying the kids now the past two weeks have asked me if they could pray when we leave together and we get them together and praying at juvenile center like God's transforming lives there like he did me and that's what I know God called me to do is go into those places we just left a rehab in a place in Kentucky where three different states different recovery centers come in one place and they do it once a month and just 40 some people come to Christ and tap down at the altar there and demons were cast out people were getting baptized the next day like God is just moving and he's calling us to go to places really where not being mean at all I still preach in churches I'm preaching at four services this weekend at my friend Amanda's Church down in Virginia but to the places the church really doesn't want to go the places where we used to hang out the rehabs the drug Corners in the middle of the streets and the jails prisons into those places and that's where my heart's at and that's where we're going to keep going so if you want to support what we do it's the way Ministries 146 jump on Facebook page or way ministries1 46.com and check it out and support us thank you man yeah you guys check it out Rob lives in faith he what he raises that's what his family lives on God provides and so if you guys want to jump on and do that and thank you for jumping in on the conversation I'm sure you'll see him again on this show man if you're listening and you're struggling rebuilding maybe just drop something in the comments and yeah if you have any questions or whatnot or just say I need prayer for rebuilding we'd love to pray for you we'll pray for each comment individually and you can always connect with us on Facebook drop an inbox Instagram I'm on X you probably don't want to follow me on X that's where all my political opinions are so if you're not conservative you're going to get offended but other than that mank thank you guys for watching the show we'll see you again soon God bless