What If the Crushing Is the Blessing? | Table 61
A conversation recorded on the floor of the furniture sale at The Table 61 in Harrisonburg, Virginia, with Jason Stuhlmiller.
The Crushing Is Where the Good Stuff Comes Out
Some people like olives, more people like the oil. It has to go through this hard process. And really, when we think about it, crushing is actually a really healthy thing. Because when we're under pressure, that's where the good stuff comes out.
I felt like I came back to something and I should have had this level of experience. I should be starting further down the track. I figured I had the handicap, if you will. And then finding out, no, not at all. You're at the starting line again.
We'll unknowingly put a law over our life that we think we can fulfill or obey. And it's a burden. There's this thing called the debtor's ethic, where you believe it's like an honor. Oh, this person has done something for me, therefore I must repay them.
Life on the Floor of the Furniture Sale
Life is a blessing, man. We're here at Table 61. We've got some awesome furniture for sale and no customers. How does that feel?
Ought to be all right, man. We've got all kinds of people that have been following along on social media. It's going to go when it goes. There's a freedom in that. It's God's timing.
In the meantime, we've got a free place to put all this stuff. And we've got a place to podcast, and we don't have a sofa this nice at the studio. I've got the ninety-nine dollar Wayfair joint. I'll probably never sit on another five thousand dollar couch again.
Well, you could buy this one for fifteen hundred. No, man, it's been fun though. I've been reflecting. I was just talking to somebody about the craziness of the last six months, and how we've been on this arc with the ministry. I've resolved that I'm not out here dumping my issues on people, but I'm also not one of those folks who's going to pretend things are good when they're not.
We've gone through some seasons not knowing what's going to happen. We have to pray in faith and believe God to do miracles. And the last two weeks, man, it's been saying after saying after saying of God reminding us. I've been young and I've been old, but I've never seen the righteous forsaken or his descendants begging for bread (Psalm 37:25, NKJV).
Obedience Is Better Than Sacrifice
You and your bride said this a while back, but it's being willing to say yes. The obedience. I think that's a key theme throughout Scripture, that God just wanted an obedient heart. What did He tell us in First Samuel 15:22? To obey is better than sacrifice (NKJV).
You talked about something earlier, how you were being transparent in your season of life, acknowledging where you stood. Sometimes people can't acknowledge where they stand and what's going on in that particular place of their life. It's hard, because you're almost delusional to the idea that this could potentially go down the drain. You're like, I'm doing anything I can to keep it afloat.
And I think that's what messes us up half the time. We're unwilling to come to Christ with transparency and say, I don't have this all together. I need your help putting it back together. What are You doing in this? Maybe You're doing something in me.
We look at things like that and we say, man, God's not with me, there's no blessing. And the reality is God is using that as a tool and an instrument to work things out of us.
What If the Crushing Is the Blessing?
What if the crushing is the blessing?
It is, bro. Paul talks about that. He's very clear on it. He says he'd rather boast in his infirmities. Who talks about boasting in infirmities? Because he understands that God's grace is sufficient, for His strength is made perfect in weakness (2 Corinthians 12:9, NKJV).
There's something beautiful about being able to share that with others and inviting them into that place. Just like we're inviting our man Jason into this space. Jason, have a seat, dude.
God calls us to these places of obedience. A lot of times you don't know the outcome. And the blessing sometimes is in the crushing that God does in those moments where we step out and it doesn't work out the way we planned. There are seasons of crushing and seasons of not crushing, where God's moving in other ways.
It's almost like making wine. The crushing in the wine press, how grapes have to be crushed. And then what happens with the wine, it has to be aged in order for it to be tasteful. I've never really drunk wine, but I hear this from people. Have you tasted this amazing wine? It's been sitting on the shelf for many years.
Sometimes we want to come to God and have this big move of God, and God's like, no, there's time. There's a process in this journey with Me. It's modeled perfectly in the life of Christ. Christ didn't have His ministry right away. He spent more time dedicated to being in relationship with the Father than He did being seen among men.
We have this false dilemma of thinking that if people see us doing great things, that means we have a deeper relationship with God. But it's not what man sees, it's what God sees in secret that He honors. So the crushing is like, man, everybody else is successful around me, but I'm still in my secret place. Lord, do something in me, so that when I'm called by You, I'll do it well.
Sometimes we go out prematurely, and that's why things don't get done properly. We have this idea, oh, I'm doing God's will. And it's like, are you doing something to selfishly gain approval among men, or do you understand you've already been validated by God, that you have access to everything in His throne?
Serving Without the Big Ministry
This is something I've wrestled with. How is it that I've been serving the Lord since 2013, and yet I don't really have this big ministry? And the reality is, man, if I didn't do anything in my life but serve Him well and take time with my neighbors, and love my wife and love my children, is that enough?
Yeah. That's your first ministry.
It reminds me of the olive pressing process. To get the oil, it has to go through this crushing. Some people like olives, more people like the oil. It has to go through this hard process. Crushing is actually a really healthy thing, because when we're under pressure, that's where the good stuff comes out. And the Lord can use it to rid us of things as well. There has to be this intense pressure to see what's on the inside.
The Lord Is Pressing Us in This Season
What do you think the Lord's pressing you in this season?
He's already been pressing me the last six months. I was processing through this last night, trying to reflect on everything. Obviously there's the grief layer I've been walking through. But even before that, things weren't in a great spot. We were struggling, making some major decisions.
For me, it's stepping away from something that on the surface seemed to be successful and moving in the right direction. Walking away from something we had invested four or five years of our life into. And then walking into Teen Challenge and expecting that when we come back, this thing is just going to explode like it did back in 2011. And then the exact opposite happens. I'm running into the wall over and over, and the wall won't break.
And then you add the other stuff that's going on personally, the grief and all that. You mix that in there, and so I'm having to trust the Lord to find other ways to provide for the thing He's called us to do. I don't say any of that because I'm cynical or frustrated. But it's been an education, and that education has felt like crushing. Because I felt like I came back and I should have had this level of experience, I should be starting further down the track. I thought I had the handicap. And then finding out, no, not at all. You're at the starting line again.
I love what I heard Jackie Hill Perry say the other day. She said the season that you're in is your assignment. It's learning how to live presently in the moment. Not looking further down the line, but being fully aware of what's going on around you and in your midst. That's my assignment. It's not, oh, we're going to do all these great things tomorrow.
We have all these plans and ideas, and those things aren't wrong. It's good to plan and to dream. But we miss the important things, because we're so fixated on the future that we miss the souls we walk by daily. We miss the opportunity to pick up our child, or minister to our wife, or whatever it may be. I try to tell my kids all the time, I'm always looking for the opportunity to speak into somebody else's life, because I have the gift of exhortation.
The Destination Is Empty Without the Process
As a culture, we're so set on the destination. We want to speed through the process and get to the place. And we get there and it's empty. It's not as good as we thought. But it's the process that the Lord cares about, because that's where all this stuff we're talking about happens.
When we get to that destination we were aiming at, we learn, no, it was the process that refined us. It was the process that built me, not the place I was going. It was how I got there. And you can enjoy it better. It's like the oil. Back to the oil.
This process sucks sometimes. It's like my kids when I have to make them something. If it's baking cookies, they're like, turn the light on in the oven, I want to see it baking. They love that process. But then when they eat the cookie, they might take one bite. This sucks. It was the process of being in the kitchen with me, in proximity with me, doing it with me. I cooked breakfast for dinner yesterday, and all of the kids were like, Dad, can I help? We all partook in making food for the family, and they didn't even care about the food. They just wanted to be with me.
There's a story on one of the worship albums like that. He was working on his keyboard racks in his garage one day, and his little boy came up to him, Samuel. And he's like, I help you, daddy, with his little toys. At first he got irritated because he was trying to get this done. And then God speaks to him and says, you know, Jason, you do that with Me all the time. You show up in your songs and your worship, I help you daddy, I help you daddy. And you're really not helping Me. I just want to be with you. It's just the time. I never forget that illustration.
Preparation Takes Time
Rob mentioned something I want to come back to. He cooks. Let's have him expand on that, because I know this guy doesn't cook.
No, I'm afraid of the kitchen too.
It's funny. I grew up in a house full of women, no male figure at all, so I have a lot of the domestic tendencies when it comes to the housekeeping aspect of life. This has kept me in a great marriage. It serves my wife in ways where she's sitting in rooms of other women who talk about their husbands doing nothing, and she's just grateful she has a husband who serves her.
Going back to the process of the crushing, one of the hardest things about cooking is the preparation. It takes so much time. A well-cooked meal is prepared well. But often, what do we want? Something fast. We live in this generation where everything is given to you immediately. We were talking about this earlier, the access we have to things that give us instant gratification. And so there's a lack of contentment. We want the destination, but we don't want to endure the process of getting there.
So we say, you know what, if you can't get me there, I'm going to go to the next best thing. I prayed and asked God and He didn't answer, so I'm going to go to this individual. Whatever you're dealing with, whatever you're struggling with, let me encourage you in this moment that what you're pursuing is only temporary. Paul talks about this. The things which are seen are temporary, but the things which are unseen are eternal (2 Corinthians 4:18, NKJV). We have to have an eternal mind frame, just like he tells us in Colossians chapter three. We have to set our minds on things above (Colossians 3:2, NKJV). It's a mindset. If we don't change the way we think, we're not going to view God properly. We're not going to see Him in His entirety.
When I worked at Chick-fil-A, even at a place like that where you get your food in three minutes, you have no idea what happens days prior in the kitchen. None of that stuff is pre-breaded. The chicken comes in, it's thawed over days, and you have to go through and individually break each piece open so it's ready to be hand-breaded. There's days and days of preparation, all these systems built so you can roll up to the drive-through and get your food in three minutes or less.
But even behind anything that's instantly gratifying, there's a cost on the other side. Somebody paid a price. Either the person serving it to you paid the price, or we pay the price for not being prepared. It's got to be paid. You either pay it now or later.
Contentment Is a Dangerous Word
So how do we live a life of contentment? Jason, you've been through some interesting seasons, raising funds for yourself. There was a lot of labor behind the scenes that people don't see. You've made a big impact in this community by feeding the homeless. When you didn't see the results you're getting now from the relationships you've built, did you wrestle with whether you were doing the right thing? Or were you content in the promise God gave you with the vision?
That's a loaded question. Contentment is a dangerous word, because as a society we're striving for that place. And it's actually a very dangerous place, because in a content place is where we don't desire or need God. I'm careful as I use it, because I always want to be dependent on Him, not in a place of being content in what I'm in.
But I'll shift it a little. I think dreaming with the Lord is my answer. As you say yes to the Lord and invite Him into dreaming, there's a hope we can't conjure up by ourselves. Even in talking about this space, we started in eight hundred square feet, and dreaming with the Lord and saying yes to opportunity, multiple of the ministries we're doing now weren't planned. We just said yes. It met a need, and the Lord breathed on it and it happened.
That's what Justin and I were talking about before you came in. It's just the obedience factor. Sometimes our natural minds, while we're very talented, put hindrances or stumbling blocks in place for ourselves. It has to look like I dreamed it up. But when we're really spirit-led, like the Word says, and we let the Lord lead, He blows our mind with the capacity we have, the way He wants to do things.
That's the part that's interesting, because the leadership brain in me says I need to go out and cast a five and ten year vision. The part of me that wants to sit in front of a board, or in front of people who can fund the thing, wants to put together a five and ten year crystal clear vision and building plan. People get hung up on that. But the spirit-filled side of me says, just go forward and trust God along the way. That tension, for me personally, is constantly in my way. Trying to trust the Lord to take the next step, but also feeling like I have to force it or make it happen.
Just Follow Me
I laugh in my head, because I'm thinking, Jesus is just terrible about casting vision. Just follow Me. Just follow Me. Where are You going? Leave your boat. Leave your dead. Let the dead bury the dead. Eat My flesh. Imagine somebody coming up to a stage like that. Would we really follow that?
Well, first of all, I think they were on fentanyl.
I was processing that recently. At that point He had seventy-two disciples. Then when Jesus said, eat My flesh, drink My blood, sixty of them left. That whole passage was crazy. In John 6, many of them went back and walked with Him no more. And He didn't chase them down. He confronted His disciples after the fact and said, are you going to leave too? And they said, Lord, we have nowhere else to go. You are the answer. You are the truth.
Better at Letting It Out Than Getting More In
Back to contentment. Performance and striving are the enemy of being spirit-led. We were talking about identity earlier. As sons, we have as much of Jesus as we're willing to take. And if I feel like I have to earn or do something to get more, then I'm acting out of character, because He's already provided. He's already given. He's already done. We just need to learn how to receive.
This striving, this performance, it's not how we're supposed to be. Business in the world is based on that. I'm not saying the marketplace can't be Kingdom, it definitely can. But that philosophy doesn't work with the Kingdom, because He has given. If anything, we have to be better at letting it out than getting more in.
That leads me to that text. Matthew 11:28. Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest (NKJV).
The Debtor's Ethic
We'll unknowingly put a law over our life that we think we can fulfill or obey. And it's a burden. There's this thing called the debtor's ethic, where you believe it's an honor. Oh, this person has done something for me, therefore I must repay them. That's like a law we live by. Oh man, how could I return the favor?
In some countries it's actually frowned upon. If I bless you, I'm not expecting anything in return. But we live in a culture where if somebody blesses you, they're expecting something back. It's like if I loan you money. Hey, where's my money? I gave you two hundred dollars, I'm expecting you to give it back in two weeks. That's not how God operates. That's not how He functions.
When we're able to acknowledge the state we're in, we're able to come to Him freely and receive the rest He's wanting to offer. But we can't receive it if we're unwilling to acknowledge the burden we've placed upon ourselves, that He never gave us. We've learned to follow the world's ways more than we've learned to follow His.
Statements That Sound Good But Aren't Bible
I've been doing this series on Facebook recently. I take a statement that sounds good but isn't biblical, and I explain it. God won't give you more than you can handle. Or, once an addict always an addict. Stuff like that.
The one I did the other day was a quote I saw circulating social media for a while, and it's very direct. I'm no longer going out of my way for people who wouldn't cross the street for me. I've seen a lot of Christians share that. Oh, boundaries, you won't even bother lifting a finger. And I read that and I'm like, yeah, that sounds good. Screw them, I'm not helping them.
But then I'm like, what about Jesus, where He said if somebody asks you to go one mile, go two? That whole process of doing for others, the debtor's ethic thing, it's like, where are we? Are we serving because we've been called to serve, or are we just trading favors with people? It's easy to serve people who can do for you. Those are the people we all want to serve.
The Ones Nobody Wants
I remember Matthew Barnett talking about this when he went to Skid Row. He was going to LA to plant a church, and I've told this story a bunch of times, but I heard him share it when he was at Stuarts Draft. He said, God called me to LA to plant a church, and I'm thinking I'm going to be with the celebrities, all the well-to-do people. And then the Lord has him on Skid Row.
And the Lord gave him a word in the middle of doing all that. If you'll go after the ones that nobody wants, I'll give you the ones that everybody wants. Within a few years he ended up at Angelus Temple, the Aimee Semple McPherson church, and now he's got the Dream Center, and celebrities come into the church. He never went and pursued them. He pursued the ones nobody else would.
I think that's what you guys are doing here. You're dealing with stuff all around this place, just pursuing the people nobody else wants to pursue.
John 13 and the New Command
It ties in perfectly to you being a great influencer, Jason. If anybody's watching right now, you see Jason's shirt. You probably can't see it because you don't have a good angle, but he has 13:35 on his sleeve. Jason, what does that mean?
John 13:34 and 35. In verse 34, Jesus says, a new commandment I give to you, that you love one another, as I have loved you (NKJV). Verse 35 says, by this all will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another (NKJV). The message we share is that we all have influence, but it matters how we use it. We can influence people positively or negatively. And we have the choice. It's kind of like that Scripture in Deuteronomy, today I lay before you life and death. Choose life (Deuteronomy 30:19, NKJV). So we choose to influence in a way that gives life.
It makes me think of First Peter 4:8. Love will cover a multitude of sins (NKJV). Love can do what you don't have the power to do. Because Paul says, and I love this, in Second Corinthians chapter five, the love of Christ compels us (2 Corinthians 5:14, NKJV). And he goes on to say we've been given the ministry of reconciliation (2 Corinthians 5:18, NKJV). As God's love is compelling us, it's going to help us reconcile humanity back to Him. Because we've become new creations. The old has passed away, behold, all things have become new (2 Corinthians 5:17, NKJV). So we're influencing the world by the power of God's love, through the working of the Holy Spirit, to draw men back to Him.
Closing
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Thank you, Jason, for joining us today at Table 61. If you're ever in Harrisonburg, come visit. How can they find you?
Our Facebook page, and just come down to 430 North Mason Street. Somebody's always here.
Love y'all. Take care.
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