Meth Took Everything - God Gave Me the Mic

November 7 2010 man I have been up for seven days all meth I went out to party that last night and we couldn't find any mess so we went and bought some cocaine find out dude show me BC powder how that go what I'm saying I'm upset so I'm like what skip this let's just go get some crack what I'm saying I know I can get some rock what I'm saying so we went and got some crack cocaine and it's funny because we're driving back home I always remember this vividly and we're over there drinking and cop comes up behind us turns on his lights and I'm like oh man I just got the crack what I'm saying we got open containers and I'm over here praying God if you get me out of this I never do this stuff again boom the cop gets right up behind us and slingshots around us well hey everybody Welcome again to another episode Rob how's it going today man hey man coming live from San Diego from the vehicle I'm in the whoopty the hoopty whatever you want to call it y'all out there no it's a beautiful day I'm really excited for this call because this is going to be something that is going to bless each and every single one of you guys for the ears to here and the hearts that are ready to receive and so just just be open I think that's something that I always want people to to take away from these calls is to have an open heart I think when you come with expectations and have an open heart you're able to receive something that is very beneficial for not only your right now but your future and so on thank you so much Craig for jumping on this call with us and being able to bless our viewers and those that are listening well thank you guys for having me it's always a privilege to be able to share What the Lord Has Done what I'm saying so yeah thank you guys for having me you're in San Diego huh man somebody was just telling me I need to go to San Diego oh yeah San Diego's lit it's also really expensive yeah I know yeah I have holes in my pockets yeah my wife and I we actually just got done on a trip we went to Mission Bay ski Resort or a Mission Bay Resort beautiful man they got like this like amusement park style thing on the beach music venues oh man it was awesome so it was definitely a blessing so I got some recommendations for you when you come out this side amen appreciate that yeah I'll definitely hit you up how things are expensive out there right you were just telling me like the tax rate is out of control oh yeah I don't want to get into complaining about the government but here we are it just happens yeah so right yeah ain't no getting around it these days I know they try to especially when you start I remember back when I was working hourly job and overtime and how much they like to hit that overtime and the tax rate on that it's like it gets to a point where those like diminishing returns there's no point in working the extra hours right because they're just going to take the time and a half to everything anyways it's craziness well I got to meet Craig a few weeks ago he was here in Virginia and we did a hip-hop concert here at the church and Craig and K drama and a few other local rappers that come out and minister to our community and it was such a good night and we met each other in the hallway at the church prior to the event and just found out that we had some similar back story and on when you meet somebody and you just hear you hear that fire and then hunger in them and that's what I heard when I met you Craig I heard just how you were how grateful you were for what the Lord had done in your life and then hearing how the Lord pulled you out of a meth addiction being that was my drug of choice back in the day I always connect pretty quickly with anybody who's fought and beat that battle as well and so we got to talk a little bit you went live on the page from the concert for just a few minutes and went through your testimony but immediately knew that I wanted to get you here on the show and go a little deeper with you and hear about some of your journey so on if you want to just start out by introducing yourself a little bit to the audience on letting everybody know some of your backstory and then we'll take the conversation from there and see where the Lord leads this whole thing amen yeah well so of course my name is Craig James I'm also known as five I do Christian rap but man so November 7th it'll be 13 years that I've been clean and sober about November 7 2010 man I have been up for seven days all meth I went out to party that last night and we couldn't find any mess so we went and bought some cocaine find out dude Sony BC powder how that go what I'm saying I'm upset so I'm like what skip this let's just go get some crack I'm saying I know I can get some rock what I'm saying so we went and got some crack cocaine and it's funny because we're driving back home I always remember this vividly and we're over there drinking and cop comes up behind us turns on his lights and I'm like oh man I just got the crack what I'm saying we got open containers and I'm over here praying God if you get me out of this I never do this stuff again boom the cop gets right up behind us and slingshots around us and take something like and how we are let's go smoke this crack what I'm saying I just told God if you get me out of it I want to do this but I'm like nah let's get over here and smoke this crack so man we're over there I'm I'm getting high it's probably about six in the morning six thirty man I'm sitting on the couch 30 pack of Budweiser between my legs I'm drinking I look up and I see my little brother fighting with a friend over the last piece of crack cocaine and man that literally broke my heart because growing up we didn't have a dad my dad left when I was three my little brother was probably six months something like that and so I was his dad what like I was only male role model he had in his life as an older brother and so man I realized in that moment I failed him so bad man and man I instantly I Heard a Voice Audible Voice say go to church and it's funny because I looked up at them I'm like what go to church y'all see what we doing what I'm saying and they look at me as something from fighting but there's like you crazy we didn't say go to church what I'm saying and so I said I'm sitting there and I hear it again and I knew whose voice it was at that point and so man I called my cousin I'm like man I got to get to church her mom was actually the pastor of our church in the little town that I'm from Earth Texas just to go back a little bit man I'm from a small town it's it's called Earth Texas in the Panhandle right between Amarillo Texas and Lubbock Texas if anything about that area and man Town's so small you blink you miss it but so I called my cousin we're in Lubbock at this point and Lubbock's about 50 hour drive 50 minute drive to Earth and so I called my cousin like man I got to get to church what I'm saying and so she comes and picks me up and we drive to Earth I get to the church man like I didn't I tell people I didn't pass go I didn't collect 200 I walked in there and I went I walked straight to the altar like I didn't sit there I wasn't I tell people man I had already got a word from God he told me to go to church and I knew if he told me to go to church he was going to meet me there and so and I man and honestly my thoughts were if you don't meet me here I don't know what I'm gonna do what I'm saying like I'm I'm tired of this like yo this life is I know there's something better than this I know there's something greater for me man I always get teary eyed when I sorry yeah but yeah so he so I walked straight up to the altar my aunt when the door is open man I promise you like it was the most man beautiful thing because the way she smiled at me it was as if God himself was smiling through her what like she already knew because this anime like her name her name was Patricia Robinson she's my mom's sister she had she was a person in my life man that would never judge me for being on dope what like her relationship with the Lord was one of the most genuine things I've ever seen in my life to this day I've yet to see somebody who loved like her what like she never judged man she was always telling me Craig quit running God's got a plan for your life when you quit running and I and like I'd get on the phone towards the end of my addiction these demons would manifest they call them Shadow monsters but I know what they really are what and so they would start to manifest man and so the only place I would feel safe was in the word or I pick up the phone and call my aunt Pat because she has something in her that those demons didn't want no part of and so I would call her and she had stage four cancer right mind you and she would pick up the phone she would talk to me for hours until I came down she would get out of her bed and drive to where I was just to sit with me and tell me Craig quit running God's got a plan for it once you make up your mind and quit running I promise you it's going to turn around and so I walked in that church man she looked at me the way she smiled it was just beautiful and she walked down from Beyond the pulpit and came up front and she looked at me and she said you're tired huh and bye oof Jesus she said you're tired huh and I was like man I'm so tired and man like immediately when she laid her hands on me and began to pray man I felt the weight come off of me I felt everything just leaving me and man that day at that altar once again I heard the audible voice of God these are the only times I've really heard this voice and he said show the world my grace that's what he told me show the world my grace and so that's that's why I go by the name five go ahead are we good oh yeah so the reason I go by the name five is because the biblical number for grace and favor is five and so what I did was I took the number five added i v e to it and what it means is Grace is Victory Everlasting and so that's that's the reason of my name and so man he told me show the world is Grace I didn't know what that meant at the time but I was completely healed delivered set free that day November 7 2010 no 12 steps no rehab like God delivered me from a 12-year meth and cocaine addiction like that and the same day so after that church service I call my wife she's my wife now but at the time she was just my baby mama right we had a kid together and so she had she was fed up man and so that weekend the reason I was so high and trying to just get over it was because we had split up what I'm saying we had left and so I called her on Sunday and I'm like I called her that afternoon because my grandmother and my aunt Pat we were going to another church service at 3 P.M in Lubbock Texas with some family so they had a like a it was just a special church service what and so I called her and asked her to go and because she loved my grandma my aunt Pat she's like okay I'll go and so and she always said as soon as she got to the car she saw a different person she knew it me and she was like this is not the Craig I know and so she ended up getting saved at that church service and we gave we dedicated Our Lives to the service of Jesus together that day at that church service so and then we ended up getting married how it is man God opens your eyes and you're like man we living in this scene hey hold up so we ended up getting married we got saved November 7 2010 got married January 8th 2011 which was about it two months in a day from the time of our Salvation so we tried to put the wedding together as quick as possible because you already know man when you're living together and you're a man and a woman man that enemy gonna come in and try to do something and we once we got saved we made a vow to God and stay absent until we got married even though we had already had a kid we just realized that we were in Arab man and like we weren't going to continue to do god like that and so until we got it right and so yeah we did that and I think because we did that man our relationship is so strong our bond is so strong like man she's with me almost all the time man now but six months later a friend of mine brought me a beat and he was like man well actually it was my wife's cousin's husband he was like man have you heard of this dude and he showed me this song called praying for you by Lecrae I didn't know what Christian rap was I was like oh this is a thing it's a Christian rap what I'm saying like because I had threw away all my Tupac what I'm saying like ah yeah I threw away all my music my zero from Texas so I when I got saved you're gonna call me religious whatever I was just like man I'm not listening to none of this stuff and what God told me he was like give me six months give me six months like I want you to dive in my word cut off everybody like I had to cut off my baby brother I had to cut off all my friends family like if you weren't on what I was on I couldn't be around you and it wasn't because I thought I was back it did it wasn't because I thought I was better than them it was just because I knew that if I went around that I would fall right back into the Trap so I had to wait till God built me up so I could go back in there and reach out and reach in yeah wow that's so good yeah man oh I know Rob usually goes down this Rabbit Trail and so yeah I was gonna ask about your family and so go ahead Rob I know you want to go there first yeah the BC powder my brother did that to me I was getting ready to go to rehab and I wanted to get high one more time before going to rehab and I asked my brother I said dude help me get something just so I can get squared away one more time before going off to get help and this fool sold me this bag it was like baking powder BC powder so I've been there before that's a frustrating man you have such a powerful story so for many things one my birthday is January 6th my wife's birthday is January 10th my grandmother's name is Patricia okay which was an amazing influence in my life and so anytime I hear about the prayer of a family member you were delivered and set free way before you were delivered and set free thank you Jesus yes we don't even understand that our deliverance and our freedom comes from a place of when the seed is planted and so we look at things from a natural too often that we never really get the to glory in the Supernatural and it's that's why Jesus always says seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness in all things he's not look his kingdom isn't exposed to the Natural man it's exposed to the supernatural man and so your aunt which was a believer had Authority and rights to go on your behalf and petition as a high priest would do for the people and presented the sacrifice of her cry on your behalf which sets you free and it's so amazing because when I hear stories like this a lot of people always man on these podcasts it's always the grandmother the aunt the mom whatever the family members generally a woman too it's generally a woman it's not a man in fact it's very interesting to me right and so it was the labor holy spirit thank you just like when a woman gives birth God said this in the Book of Genesis right he says because of your sin Eve now what's gonna happen you're gonna have to labor right you're gonna go through tremendous pain and we our sin causes people pain but there's a seed that's planted inside of a woman that brings forth a birth yes and you don't see what gross in Dark Places and so five being that it's the number of grannies this ministers to me in the season of life that I'm in if I can even be transparent on this podcast because I need Grace amen just because Justin and I sit here before y'all and five sit here before y'all with no drug and alcohol addiction doesn't mean that we don't need Grace anymore I know that dude right we all need it but the point of why we have these stories the point of why we do this podcast is because we want to remind y'all that y'all have purpose and so five man like it really stirs me up to know Avail that you took the time to separate yourself and if you could like speak to that just a little bit more of the importance of removing people from your inner circle even your little brother as you've mentioned so that you could get right because if you're not right how could you ever take anybody else with you right exactly and I tell people all the time listen you show me your five closest friends I'll show you your future what I'm saying drug dealers hang out with drug dealers man strippers hang out with strippers what I'm saying like that's that's just real man and if you throw a white shirt in a muddy puddle 10 out of 10 times that white shirt's going to turn brown that muddy puddle will never turn white ever and so a lot of times people think that they could go and do these type of things especially when you're not graced for it and God hasn't called you there you ain't gonna be able to stand the enemy been doing his job since he failed like you ain't gonna outsmart the devil I'm sorry to tell you that there's only one thing to come back to him and that's the blood of Jesus Christ that's the one thing he has no answer for and so with that six months God told me man he said just get my word bro I was watching man TBN what every Church Channel I could from morning to night just reading the word but the funny thing about that is like I was saying like the two years leading up until I got saved like every time I would get high I would get in the word or I would call my impact because these demons aren't manifest so I was reading a word I probably read the word like five six times front to back in those two years what like because I was I was a meth addict other people were tweaking on fixing stuff I'm tweaking on reading the word I'm over there reading it out loud and they tripping on me like we don't want to get high with you though like what are you doing what it's so but what I saw after I got saved and God showed me this was The Prodigal Son it says that while the sun was still afar off the father ran to meet him while the sun was still afar off and so what I realized is that you were exactly right what you said when my aunt I was already delivered my aunt had been praying that see they've been sold and what God was doing was getting ready Was preparing me for what he was about to launch me into and I didn't even know it and so I'm reading this word and all of a sudden boom your the blinders are up and now the word makes sense you're reading it you're like man that's what that means what and so for that whole six months man I was just watching nothing but pastors just preachings and just in the word like constantly like and I got to this place where and he had said give me six months and I'm gonna show you and so almost a day to that six months was over like I said my wife's cousin's husband brought me that Lecrae song and so I was like God this is what you want me to do it's funny because I'm like my grandma with Southern Baptist well my grandma Southern Baptist Mount Zion Baptist Church that's where I'm from that's my whole church in earth as I'm like man my grandma finally proud of me and now I gotta go tell her I got a rap for Jesus this ain't gonna go over well yeah but now man I promise you man man my family they support me to the fullest and it started with my aunt Pat because God gave me a year with her before she passed she actually played paid for my first music video and probably a week later she passed away she went to be with the Lord but the dope thing about that and me seeing her like and in her last days people were coming in to encourage her and walking out in Courage and I said man that's what I want my life to be what like that's how I want my life to be like she praised God literally to her last breath man and I have a line in one of my songs I said I watch it I watched her praise you till you die that's how I watched you her praise you till she died that's how I know it's true so I put my hope in you a hopeless fool is what I used to be what I'm saying like I watched this woman go through this never smoke a cigarette a day in her life and die from lung cancer you feel what I'm saying like I watch I'll watch this happen and I watched her go through it with joy of the Lord and I remember telling me one time she said Craig don't don't worry God told me he's gonna make me whole she said I don't know if that's here or there but either way I'm gonna be made whole and to have that type of strength that real to live his Christ to die his game type of mentality to me that really shook me to my core and I think that's what that's why I'm so passionate about what I do that's why I'm so passionate about what I do man because I got to witness that man and man I promise you that year we're going to every church service we could find trying to get her healed like I just wanted to be in the presence of God and the crazy thing is if I don't know what I know now but God had a planning and all and she's up there she's she's waiting and cheering us on now it's my job to get where she's at so I just pray I can make it man but yeah it's very important I'm sorry I veered off on all those things but it's very important that you have to separate yourself from people man because you can't it's it's the world doesn't want you to succeed the enemy definitely doesn't want you to succeed in the enemy he's crafty if you give him a crack if you give him an inch he gonna come in through the cracks I promise you and that's why you got to stay armored up and stand your word and you won't have to stay away from the people always God saved you so you could go back and bring them out what I'm saying but you're not going to be able to instantly do that because temptation is a very real thing and we're drawing away the Bible says we're drawn away by our own lust and desires and God took that away but if I go put myself in that environment again and constantly hang out there then I'm I'm real susceptible to fall it's going to be easy for me to try some of those things and fall back into that trap so I would recommend anybody man if you're coming off a dope or you're trying to get off the dope change your circle up so I'll just get you some friends like the people that carry this man to Jesus and the house was so packed they couldn't get to them you got to get you some friends that won't give up and climb the roof with what I'm saying get you some friends that'll tear through the roof and get you to the feet of Jesus surround yourself with people like that man but because when you do that I promise you'll get your healing because if you think about that story when they lower them down Jesus never pointed to the man and said by your faith to heal what he did he pointed to his friends and said by their faith you're healed what I'm saying and that's that's a powerful thing surround yourself with people who are willing to take you to the feet of Jesus man and if you do that I promise you things that turn around in your life foreign that process of just cutting everybody off like I know some people have a hard time with that we used to run the rehab program all the time and I would call it Superman syndrome it would come from a good place they'd be motivated and passionate in Jesus and then want to run right back into the fire and try to rescue everybody before they have learned how to navigate the fire and a lot of people struggle with that and it starts out in a good spot I'm going to the whole neighborhood I'm going to the old houses to try to minister to people but then like you mentioned a few minutes ago our own lust and our desires draw us away while we're in those places and so how difficult was that for you to make that decision it was it for you just what I know this is what I got to do I've got to work from the Lord and whatever the cost I'm going after it or whether was there some wrestling that was going on the inside while you were walking that out man for me totally on it bro I was done all right man it was easy for me man like I was done like man I hit rock bottom like I know for a fact like there's not a doubt in my mind that if I would have continued and though I wouldn't have lived another six months I'm saying like I know that like I could just feel it man I felt Death Around the Corner like literally and so for me it was just like man God I want something new and when I taste it and seen like when I showed up to that church and he showed up and showed out like man it's like Peter where I'm gonna go Lord you got the words to life like where else I'm gonna go what I'm saying like you're so good and the dope thing about that too is I forgot to mention I come to find out that November 7th is one of my favorite passes birthdays which is Billy Graham so Billy Graham was born November 7th so I was delivered November 7th and that's a person I Look to model my Ministry after man because he's so he was above reproach you never heard a Scandal come out of Billy Graham's Ministry what I'm saying like all these other pastors you might have heard scandals and some rightly so some not but Billy Graham you never heard a Scandal come out of his ministry and he was above reproach never was alone with a female in a room alone he had somebody that accountability like that's how I try to structure and model my Ministry man because the devil's crafty man and especially when you're like us you're out here speaking truth and I tell people all the time they had a meeting about you this morning yeah like yeah the demons they had a book they were in a boardroom meeting how can I get these folks to fall today saying they had a meeting about you like and it's one thing to choose God it's another thing where God chooses what I'm saying I tell people this all the time like just ask job that question what I'm saying the devil wasn't checking for Joe God put job on the devil's radar what I'm saying like so God go to allow some things to come but he also will strengthen you and he gave you everything you need to succeed he said greater is he that is in me than he that is in this world that means the spirit that we got man is greater than any Spirit the demon can conjure up man there's there's nothing they can throw at us if we really believe in this Jesus that we claim to serve because man he said With God all things are possible what I'm saying so like but you got to be with God what I'm saying yeah that's really good yeah thank you no I was just gonna say man you were talking about the whole suffering with joy and watching that in your family member and your aunt and I I remember seeing that in my grandmother when she passed away she had cancer and never complained near the end she just and I saw her the night before she went home to be with Jesus and I'll never forget going into the living room and talking to her I was living at her house at the time and I was saved and she got to see me get my life together and all that as well I remember going to see her and talking to her and I just got home from choir practice I was still trying to be on the choir at the church back then that was a terrible decision but but man I was on fire and just excited to do anything and everything yeah I know that's right even if I was singing when I couldn't sing and I got home from choir practice and I had that conversation with my grandmother and she said I can't wait till I get to sing in the choir again she went home to be with Jesus that night but you shared that story about your aunt just God's got a whole meal on the other side of this he's gonna heal me and as it's coming but there was just that suffering with joy yes and I think that's something that's lost in the Christian faith a lot in modern times is like there's a lot of prosperity and God wants to bless us and I don't think he means for us all to be in poverty like there's the extreme on both sides of it but we don't hear the discussion about maybe the call is to learn how to suffer with joy right if that was the path laid out for our savior like and so I would just love to hear your thoughts and elaborate on that a little bit like what did her example teach in regards to how you carry out your day-to-day and being able to face whatever comes your way with joy hey man yeah man just she affected me so much like man I give my number out to addicts all over the country man and I'm like man I don't care what time it is and call me I literally just this past weekend I think it was Saturday morning man I didn't get to bed till probably two in the morning I'll get up to go use the restroom four in the morning and one of my friends a brother of mine who's falling back and he's calling me and I knew exactly what it was I picked up the phone and stayed on the phone with him for two hours man just praying with him loving on them telling them not to give up keep going like literally this just happened this weekend like I was on FaceTime with him because he's scared he's he's out his mind and so I was telling my wife I said it's so awesome how now I get to be that person for people what I'm saying like I had that person now I get to be that what and that's just me man like people are like hey you give people your number this then and I was like man bro like you don't understand like I needed somebody to talk to when I was on this stuff bro and I know they do too so for me it's a no-brainer like here's my number if you feel like you're about to use if you're in the middle of a drug binge or whatever and you just need somebody to talk to call me don't don't what I'm saying we hope they do it before they go use like because I always tell them like call me before if you feel like you want to go use call me before let's pray out of it let's I'll pray you down like but even if you do use if you feel you need somebody to talk to call me I'll I'll stay on the phone with you however long you need me to what I'm saying because I signed up for this saying this is my life and this is what I'm called to and so man that just impacted me in that way so much man just to see her like that and she had stage four cancer doing all of this and then just to see her just like you ask anybody about my aunt Pat that knows her and like man her funeral like it was probably it was packed in there because she was just so loving and like her laughter man like God just gave her a gift of laughing like bro I just missed that laugh one day I can't wait to get to heaven that's gonna be the first thing out here I already know Craig what I'll be like man yeah so man but just to watch her like literally but deny herself men and suffer like you said with the joy and in all honesty like of course like you said God's Gonna Prosper us he said above all I wish that there would Prosper even as your soul prospers what I'm saying like first of all you got to be growing spiritually before you can even think about Prosperity but God never promised us that what he did promised us was suffering like he promised us suffering man but he said take heart I've overcome the world so you can too like we're gonna suffer he suffered they did it to him he tells us every day deny yourself and take up your cross take it up your cross means you're headed to Calvary yeah you're getting beat you're getting booed you don't say you're getting bruised like taking up your cross that's not no easy thing like every day you're walking up the hill to Calvary with him what I'm saying in that to crucify your flesh what I'm saying and so it's gonna be some tough times man and but I think we should like James said count it all joy because all that's happening is that it's working our faith and working our patients it's it's building us we go from Faith to Faith from glory to glory we can't stay in the same place what and that's that's my motto man like every day I'm like God I got to be better than I was yesterday what I'm saying we might not get it up right every day but what I'm saying that's why it's a beautiful thing that we have a savior who has Grace and his mercies new each morning what I'm saying so right yeah man go ahead I think something that's really the person that said it the best was the Apostle Paul when he said godliness with contentment is great gain yes sir I think the thing is that in Christianity we don't have contentment anymore it's all right yeah we heard you amen that's right dog the dog said amen but no honestly guys this is huge right because if I can be vulnerable and transparent I think for me when I moved out to California right like I had this vision in mind I had this idea and because I wasn't content with where I was I thought the other side how they say the grass is green on the other side thing and so like even though God gave me the approval to move out here and I got confirmation from him on the matter it's almost like he gave me the opportunity just to give it to me so that I can see what it wasn't though I thought it was and so when we found for when we find fulfillment in God and in God alone there's a peace that comes that surpasses all understanding and I think that's what we need to really offer to those that are struggling in addiction is because that's what they want contentment they want to know that it's going to be okay and I remember I had sleepless nights not knowing it was going to be okay I was looking over my shoulder left and right and wondering is it going to be me next because I've lost so many friends right and so [Music] [Music] [Music] just this understanding and knowing that I'll get there it might not be now might not be tomorrow because we're talking about prosperity and so the most prosperous thing I think it's in the book of Isaiah but true Prosperity is in Christ it's in Christ everything is found in Christ and so what we do is we look outside of him to find things that can only be found inside of him right and that's why Paul says in Galatians 2 20 he says I've been crucified with Christ I no longer live but as Christ who lives in me right and I think five man I think that's what's happened with you it wasn't just you took six months away like you truly died when you walk through that church door and you put your face upon that altar right you died at that moment even though you struggle from a day-to-day basis you're constantly dying right and now you have this newfound Faith but also you started this ministry that I like to like navigate towards in our conversation and discussion is music right so now you're you're putting to paper on pan or from pen to paper everything that God has like brought you through man so if you can like speak to us about that like I guess that's how you're making money now or providing for your family or well yeah God provides man yeah right definitely a long time this year man God just spoke to me man I I stopped selling merch at events just because I was reading in the word and this year I really wanted to trust God and he said he sent him two by two and told him to take nothing with them and so this year man I just been really trusting in God man I started taking I don't charge an on a ram anymore I just do love offering like whatever I tell the people just pray God knows what I need whatever God number God gives you that's what you give me and just honor that man like I don't put a price on Ministry anymore and so but he provides man and then my wife has a great job and that's a blessing and a story in itself but but yeah the music making music man is really how I help provide for the family man and I've been doing this full time 12 years now serving the lord man and he's that scripture I've never seen the righteous forsaken nor seed beg for bread that's a real thing what I'm saying when you're chasing God and you brought it up a while ago you said Matthew 6 33 seek ye first the kingdom and his righteousness and all these things shall be added unto you and in layman's terms what that means is if you chase God you don't got to chase things the things you need chase you literally what I'm saying like if you need a man or a woman guess what if you're chasing God's going to send a writing man right man or woman to chase after you if you're chasing God money will chase you I promise what I'm saying you just have to do what he said seek you first the kingdom and his righteousness and all these things shall be added but yeah the music thing man like it's a blessing for me man I use it definitely as a tool here lately I'll be getting more into preaching speaking like I don't know if you've ever been to a five event I do a lot more talking than I do the music the music is just bait for me to get you there and then I'm Gonna Give You My Testimony I'm gonna give you the word and then we're gonna watch God be God and see people say free man I try to tell these folks when I go like so this tour I'm doing right now it's called Heart of Worship I just believe we need to get back to worship man and in one Accord because anytime you're reading the Bible where it says they were found in one mind and one Accord is followed by the spirit when they were in Upper Room it says 120 of them that were there and one mind and one Accord and the spirit of the Lord moves so mightily that 3 000 people came to know the Lord that day from 120 people being in one mile one Accord I think a lot of times these days people come to church because it's the right thing to do or they come to church because it's something they've been taught to do some people come to church so they don't get talked about I'm saying then you got the flip side of that where people don't come to church because they've been talking about what I'm saying but I always try to tell people if you're coming to anytime you're coming to a gathering of Believers if you're coming for anything other than to meet with Jesus then you're coming for the wrong reasons what I'm saying if you're not coming to meet with Jesus then I really don't need you there because the people I'm trying to reach and I'm trying to touch they need the Believers to be in one mind one Accord because if we could get there if we could come in one mind one of course the Believers in the room I Promise You 3 000 can get saved everybody can get saved but I feel like we live in a time and age where everybody's trying to build their own kingdom man and it's a sad thing man and I'm I'm so this tour I'm doing just Heart of Worship is trying to bring people back to that like bro let's focus on the main thing I'm coming back it's all about Jesus I'm sorry Lord for the things we made it but it's all about you like this ain't about nothing but you like and for me to get back to this place 12 years later to this place where when I first got saved and it's just like God I don't want nothing but you because in the midst of the journey you could get lost in the sauce man what I'm saying you start hanging with the big names and you start wanting to get some of these shiny things but then when you get to the end of it you realize man all that stuff didn't mean nothing especially as a Believer bro all I want to do right now is get back to Jesus get back to Christ and let him know that I'm really I really love him and I really love people and I'm here to be used and so that's that's where I'm at right now with the music thing and the ministry man just going out and being like Jesus man like Jesus wasn't in the synagogue if he was out there with them Sinners dog what I'm saying like that's just real like he if Jesus was in the synagogue he was chomping off the church I'm sorry to go read it he was he would jump off the church and have compassion on the loss that's who Chrysler because the problem was is they felt like they didn't need a physician and I feel like today we've got Believers that are creating a form of godliness but deny the power of like it's there it's different Jesus is out here if you catch my drift now what I'm saying like and we need to get back to the god of the Bible man the god of the Bible that's that's where I want to be he said 12 years you've been doing music right 12 years and you've been walking this journey of faith and kept yourself from slipping into either Pursuit right of the shiny things or trying to build this thing traditionally and just walk in and Trust man that's it's phenomenal right that's that's uncommon I think and so what does that look like I know I think about it a lot man I'm a father I got four girls and I'm on this ministry Journey as well but then also yeah so I think about that in this ministry Journey right because it's like this balance of like providing trusting and Rob and I talk about this a lot like you're trusting God to provide for us but then also knowing we're responsible for about him for the kids and it's like okay God I know you got me but I got there I'll take care of that and that's some of the Battlegrounds so how have you walked through that and I've been able to just keep your focus and know that this is all the Lord's got this and he's going to be the one to take care of and provide as you just put your trust in him and get focused on the Heart of Worship yeah man like for me man like man I have a piece about not selling merch like I don't have to mess with it like what I'm saying and what really made me really want to start selling mergers most of the time I go at the end and I'm doing altar call and I'll look up and I'll see somebody exchanging money while people are crying out to God and that really irks my spirit man like man if Jesus was going to flip a table at any time bro it's gonna be right now man like he said my house should be a House of Prayer what I'm saying like and so when it's time to focus on the things that God I believe we should be focused on the things that God not trying to make a dollar what I'm saying you could do that after the event so that's why I did like and for me I always want to lead by example I'm not going to talk about something when I'm doing it you feel what I'm saying I'm not finna say oh man I don't want to do this like so I try to lead by example man and it's it's I've taken a financial hit but not really though because God has provided everything I need man like I and I'll give you one testimony right and so I was going to Montana probably about a month and a half ago I had a three-day event in Montana and I'm not putting nobody's names or nothing out there but I already knew it's going to be little to nothing that they were going to bless me with because he had already told me they're bringing Jeremy Camp and they got to raise forty thousand dollars so I'm like oh man you gotta raise this so and this was for another concert so I'm like I told my wife I'm like it's all good I know this weekend's not going to be very fruitful as far as financially but we're storing up treasure in heaven anyway so let's get it and so I go to the airport and I usually buy my flight a day before because I don't want to just fly in and go straight into Ministry and so I had a layover in Salt Lake City right and so I'm sitting there at the layover and the woman comes up to me and she's like Hey sir we overbooked this flight do you mind if we give you two thousand dollars to get off and I'm like travel credits and she's like no we're gonna give you 2 000 cash and I'm like oh yeah I'm up what I'm saying like this literally happened Delta this is a true story like Delta literally gave me two thousand dollars to take an early flight the next morning right so they give me the money they give me a nice hotel I was actually able to pick I would say I feed the best hotel they put me up and then the next morning I told my wife I was talking to her because she was like tripping she's like what like oh you see I was like bro I told you guys gonna take care of it and I was like I get I bet you they put me in first class like I was just joking so I get on the plane and guess where I'm at First Class chilling what I'm saying like God and for me I felt like that was just God saying I got you son don't worry about it what like you let me have a great Poupon right yeah that's awesome great people no it's it's really cool that you say that because I was telling somebody the other day and I stole this from somebody so I don't have rights to this but a gentleman came up to me he says how old are you I said I'm 34 years old he says have you ever gone without and I look back I'm like no he's like he said how did you make it this far and when you begin to actually think about it you've been provided for your whole entire life you're always your circumstance and situations not might not be in alignment with what you believe they should be but the fact of the matter is you're always taken care of we're always taking care of that even he says he reigns on the just and the unjust yes sir both not and so we get it twisted as Believers bro oh snap so God will never let me go through that it's like hold up my wife had two miscarriages two back to back one there one nearly killed her and then I had two beautiful girls right after that but God did something in my wife through that season he it was necessary for her to go through the miscarriages in order for us to get our two beautiful daughters today I'll never forget the moment I was weeping before the presence of God and the song came on by Evolution worship do it again do it again sir and so I don't know who I'm speaking to right now but God will do it again yes so fix you're wrong and make it right like he wants to take where the circumstance and the situation time and time again five we've had AIDS we've had So Courtney we've had so many people on this show and God did it again he is not a man that he shall lie trust in Jesus trust in Jesus yeah that's so good wow man Rob keeps prophesying that's the third week in a row with the prophecy for the audience he just keeps laying it down man I love it I just I'm I'm in awe all five of where you're at today because your story lo and behold more than you realize ministers to mine in my situation but not only that man this is ministering to both Justin and I because of where we're going with this podcast and what you're doing we wanted to like try to bring forth resources and all these things and I'm speaking out a term probably and this is live I don't care but God has really put a shift in us and we're just like look man let's just put out the content everything will come and the reason why we wanted resources is so that we can bless people and put them through programs and buy their plane tickets and buy their bus tickets right but God knows our heart and he will bring forth those resources in due season I think it's when you let go is when God begins to multiply it don't make sense but it's his name what it's just math it don't make sense in our logical mind cannot comprehend the mind of God he said except a seed fall in the ground and die it produces no fruit you feel what I'm saying so that's what that's your letting go once we let go right it can produce some fruit what I'm saying and just trust God man I know God's gonna take this thing further than you guys could ever imagine man it's it's good stuff bro and people need this type of stuff especially people that come from where we come from and people that just need to know that they're loved and that there's there's hope in Jesus man like what I'm saying you ain't got to stay there you ain't gotta stay in that position you had God could clean you up turn your life around what I'm saying and I gotta tell you it won't always be rainbows and butterflies on this side right because the devil he wouldn't mess he wasn't really messing with you when he had you but once you try to start to walk for the father he gonna come and throw everything and the kitchen sink at you he don't want them he don't want to lose one but praise God this podcast right here in a spot when you were talking about the not selling merch and seeing the money changing at the end of the service and that used to be a difficult thing going up the choir Services Rob remembers we would travel around and do these Teen Challenge choir Services take him out of testify and we never come home with a bunch of monthly donors because I couldn't like stop like you've got testimonies choir and you're given the word and it's like how do I go into a pitch it's just like and everybody tells me Justin you're there to fundraise like no I'm not like that's never been a mission in a week and we fought we fought financially at TC it wasn't easy we did that for 13 years running this rehab center man and it was a battle every step of the way and but it goes back I keep hearing you say the enemy's not happy we're we're going into his world we're fighting and just as Rob was speaking earlier if you're ministering so much to each of us right now and where God's taking our Journeys because there's gonna be this battle man but the reality of transformed lives on the other end of this and seeing God impact people is what it's all about man amen well awesome well five what do you got going on next were you traveling anywhere soon had any anything that people that are listening in can check you out on social or something you've got going on that you want them to be aware of oh yeah man so all right like I said I got this harder Heart of Worship tour going on right now every weekend I'm gone this weekend I'll be in New Mexico Artesia New Mexico Roswell New Mexico and then Lubbock Texas so just keep me lifted when you think of me man long weekends and when I come home I want to be present with my son he's boxing now so I'll try to help him which is dope this weekend I'm actually rapping at a in New Mexico it's like a boxing a professional boxing match and so I'm actually doing the intermission or whatever get to share the gospel what I'm saying so and so I'm taking my son with me on this one which is cool man so yeah I try to get in places where other people ain't going man like I tell people all the time when like I said when God builds you up your call to go back into those places like what I'm saying look it's so it used to be where the darkness ran from the light but these days it seems the lights running from the darkness people don't want to go into places that Jesus would be at like and always talk about Lazarus right when they said roll the stone away in March was like surely he stinks but man we serve a guy that's not afraid to go into the dark sneaky places bro like Jesus is not afraid of no dark stinky he can bring life wherever he steps like and that's a lot of people tripping a lot of people say well he cried over Lazarus Jesus didn't I cry over Lazarus Jesus cried because he was so mad because they didn't realize that life had showed up he was if you go read the scripture it says that his Spirit was super vexed he got real vexed because they were crying these same people they were sitting at his feet the other day soaking it up what I'm saying Mary was just at his feet now she balling and crying and blaming him for her brother died like he didn't cry because Lazar was dead because he already knew what he was about to do you feel what I'm saying he cried because he was so upset and he was so hurt that they didn't realize that life had just showed up like when Jesus shows up he's life man what I'm saying and so we carry that spirit so wherever we go we take the territory we're not a thermometer we're the thermostat we set the temperature yeah I said wherever we go amen so yeah man I don't know why I went there but I didn't die man amen that was good it was definitely good awesome bro but yeah so oh that's what I was going so just I'm just on the road with doing this tour man so if you guys think of me please pray for me lift me up my family just that I can continue being faithful to the caller man I like I have a heart for addicts man like that's my heart what I'm saying so I'm trying to get into those places man so just pray that open that God would open doors like any celebrate recoveries in these Victory outreaches and places like that like I'm I'm I love the church and I love being with God's people but I'm called to these people you feel what I'm saying like this is where I want to be because if they can see what God did for me if I could share my story with these people I promise you it's it's gonna turn some hearts man it's gonna turn some hard man yeah that's so good amen well hold on for those on Facebook I've tagged him somewhere around here and so you guys please go over and check his page out and for those who'll catch us on YouTube later on I'll drop the links down in the description below so you guys can follow along and just continue to pray and into on into his journey and on I hope those who are listening that may be a call in the mess found some inspiration and I think I can speak freely in saying that anybody on this call right now you connect with us we will lead you we will be thrilled we will consider it a great privilege to lead you to a place of Freedom just like we found amen and so don't hesitate to reach out and on five we've been wrapping up our calls a little differently recently we've been praying over our guests and just asking the Lord's blessing on them as we close the deal out and so Rob man did you want to jump in and just take a moment and pray over five and also those that are listening as we close out this call yeah definitely wow oh Heavenly Father we thank you I thank you Lord for this time for this moment that we were able to gather together and just share each other's stories each other's pains each other's hurts but it doesn't just end there Lord because the pain and the hurt that we have had to endure through Lord you have purpose for and God I just pray right now over our audience for every ear that is listening father I pray that they would have hope that they would have life and life more abundantly God that they would know that they are the head and not the tail that they are above and not beneath that they're more than conquerors that they're victorious in Christ Jesus I pray father that they would have a peace that surpasses all understanding that by prayer and supplication with Thanksgiving that they would make the request known unto you father I lift up five to you Lord I lift up his ministry his home his marriage his child Lord I pray in Jesus name that he would decrease and that you would increase expand his territorial Heavenly Father open up doors of opportunity bring forth Restoration in areas that he needs it reconcile him to things and places and people father that need to be reconciled unto him Lord that they could hear the truth that is being administered through and from him and so father God I just pray that the financial resources would always be there that you would take his mind off of every circumstance and situation that's not on you and bring him back to the first love that he had with you the very first time that he met you God I pray that hunger and thirst will 10x God that he would be so on fire for you God that people would just acknowledge the presence of God in his presence and so Lord we just thank you Lord we honor you and we praise you for this time for this day and for this podcast that you brought together God because it's not about us it's all about you and it's in Jesus precious and holy name we pray amen thank you everybody so much man five thank you for Craig thank you for jumping on and being a part of this call man we really appreciate it and for those who are watching please leave a comment hit like share help us spread the word about the podcast and on that's the biggest thing you could do pray for us if you need support reach out but engage hit that like button smash the share button is what this YouTuber say smash the like buttons my daughters could tell you but God bless you guys